identity

I would be careful in believing anything from a guy who wears two different kinds of flip-flops.  The guy was me (i.e. man-oh-man) soooooo proceed with caution.

Ya but, there are ways to sell yourself even though a person has deficiencies.  Oh ya.  A grocer put up a sign that read, “Eggplants, 25 cents each.  Three for a dollar.”  All day long, customers came in exclaiming, “Don’t be ridiculous! I should get four for a dollar!” Meekly, the grocer would agree and package four eggplants.  The tailor next door saw what was happening and finally asked the grocer, “Aren’t you going to fix the mistake on your sign?” ”What mistake?” the grocer asked. “Before I put up that sign no one ever bought more than one eggplant.” JoeBlow says—There is a sucker born every minute! 

Why do folks know you? There are folks who know you, yes there are. Yes, someone knows each one of us.  But some folks get their identity by someone else promoting them (e.g. most everyone heard of Paul Revere. Yet few of us have heard of Sybil Ludington because Henry Wadsworth Longfellow wrote: “Listen, my children, and you shall hear / of the midnight ride of Paul Revere.” And there are some that promote themselves. ha ha Such is life.

When you die, you will have an identity. Your obituary might say one thing, but folks know you as snooty, egotistical, loving, a game player, sweet, obnoxious, something is wrong, greedy, respectful, belligerent, showy, hardworking, crabby, negative, kind, positive, helpful, self-centered, self-glorying, bitchie, etc.   Does it really make a difference what others think of you and does it really make a difference how you lived your life?  Maybe it does and maybe it doesn’t.  Some think soooo and other don’t. 

Phil Knight in his book Shoe Dog says in the end of the book (i.e. when things worked out and he was worth a huge massive amount of money)—When it came rolling in, the money affected us all. Not much, and not for long, because none of us were ever driven by money. But that’s the nature of money. Whether you have it or not, whether you want it or not, whether you like it or not, it will try to define your day. Our task as human beings is not to let it.  

I think money changes folks if they say it doesn’t or if they think it doesn’t.  I think It does no matter what folks say. My life is different because I made some money (i.e. more than some and less than others meaning not extremely rich but comfortable for our life style—soooo far anyway).  Folks who say it doesn’t are just blowing smoke.  Now there are folks who handle money differently, but it still changes their life.  Quit kidding yourself.  Country club folks are different than Walmart folks (i.e. it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure that out—quit pretending).  Even in our churches, money affects the system—quit kidding yourself folks! That is maybe a struggle of Christianity or is it just the folks in the churches.  What do you think?  That is what I thought. Money changes our identity.  Com’on, quit kidding yourself.  Everyone gets sick of folks saying it doesn’t change them when they get money (i.e. fake evaluation).  Folks try to not to let it affect ‘em but it does.  Just look around. 

“A wise person is hungry for knowledge, while the fool feeds on trash” (Proverbs 15:14 NLT). BigHitterwithanunorthodoxswing (i.e. a golf buddy who can hit it a mile), told me that he had the same job for 25 years, but he said he learned something new every day. "Without continual growth and progress, such words as improvement, achievement, and success have no meaning.” - Benjamin Franklin

WorldClassLarry says--Success is liking yourself, liking what you do, and liking how you do it. AverageJoe says—It seems like it is soooooo hard many times for folks to have a high esteem of themselves.  Why is that do you think?  ItchieBitchie says—It’s ‘cause we compare ourselves to others.  Like I’m not included in that crowd cause I’m not a high roller, not educated enough, not in with the click, don’t play the part, not part of the elite holy huddle, I feel like folks look down on me, not smart enough, not the right race, don't have enough money, not religious, not from the right family.  These thoughts can cause problems for some folks.  I think comparison is hard on folks.  CadillacJack says—That is why a huge massive ego really works; it takes the pressure off (i.e. 'cause no one is better than you).  MissPerfect says—For me, I just get in my little world. “I have also learned why people work so hard to succeed: it is because they envy the things their neighbors have” (Ecclesiastes 4:4 GNT).

I went for a ride yeasterday on my Yamaha XT250 to another town.  I have some friends who live there and was just poking around on a warm summer day. Soooooo I drove into their housing development and was curious where one friend lives.  I sorta kind know where they lived soooo I go down the street.  There is a lady putting up flags for the 4th sooooo I would ask her.  Well, it was their place. Theguyfullofwisdomthathitsitinthemiddleofthefairwayeverytime was not home.  Soooo this is where you live--yes, I really like it--I hear you really like FL in the winter--I sure do.  IT"S A  GOOD LIFE!

And then there is the comparison of how much money folks have.  Oh ya! I read this while eating my oatmeal with half a banana on it was written by RickyRick—“As a pastor for nearly 40 years, I can tell you that the number one reason couples get a divorce isn’t adultery. It isn’t abuse. It’s debt! At one time, 54 percent of the divorces in the U.S. were related to financial pressures.”   I think many abuse debt (i.e. it’s American).  Many of you disagree with me. I think giving is good, saving is good and spend the rest on living.  BigWalletEd says--Only fools spend everything they make. BigWalletEd, many think you don’t have a clue how to manage your money and others think you are right on the mark! Comparing can even give folks high blood pressure!

"Now I will tell thee an unusual truth about men and sons of men. It is this: That what each of us calls our 'necessary expenses' will always grow to equal our incomes unless we protest to the contrary." - The Richest Man in Babylon

I had breakfast with an old college friend recently.  He started as a teacher then became a realtor, developer, general contractor, entrepreneur, and business person.  He said that many fellow business folks who took a similar route, made a little money, acted like they had a lot of money (i.e. got a big head and cocky) and most of them ended up broke (i.e. statistics does prove this to be true).  I asked him how come—they run out of bullshit!  Wow, now that is a change of identity! 

A friend sold his bulldozer to another contractor.  He didn’t pay him for a year.  Sooooo he contacted him again in which he said he didn’t want it; come and pick it up.  My friend told me that this guy is rather sleazy and takes advantage of folks (i.e. it’s his identity—everyone knows him this way).  Sooo my friend picked up his bulldozer. He told him that he thinks a fair amount for the use for one year and some damage to be $12,000.  The guy didn’t say anything but didn’t pay him.  Sooooo one day my friend goes to his office (i.e. he knows he is there).  Talked to someone in the office and said he wanted to talk to Joe.  He was told that Joe is here but they don’t know where he was.  Maybe you can come back another day. My friend took a chair and went into his office and told the person that he would wait for Joe. My friend sat there for 45 minutes; then Joe came out of a closet!  Crazy!

Several of you have mentioned to me recently that your world is shrinking (i.e. becoming smaller and you are ok with that).  You only care about your small world and a few who are on the fringes and the rest you don’t really care about anymore.  It’s maybe a change in our culture.  I have to admit that my world is a lot smaller and I’m ok with that.  I’m tired of arguing and being around folks who are weird compared to my believes and values.  It’s easier to not be around them.  I think this is magnified because of Arlene having Alzheimer’s and our age.  But, you guys tell me you are no different. I don’t know if this is good, but it appears that there is a change in our culture and society. Our identity is changing. No question! MissPerfect says—I really don’t care what others think or say anymore; most of is just bull!

I learn things in the craziest ways! I was riding my Yamaha XT250 up ‘er in ‘em hills the other day and ran into a friend who lives in those hills (i.e. he is in his mid-70s).  I learned that some things seem to change, and some things seem to stay the same.  He told me that when he was dating his wife, they would park on the hill which he thought was really a big hill.  Now, he said, the hill doesn’t appear to be very big at all any more (i.e. some things seem to appear to change).  Sooooo do teenagers still park?  When teenagers park, they look at the stars, talk, listen to music, watch the fireflies, hold hands, kiss, hug, make out, maybe pet, and maybe even have sex (i.e. some things never change—hormones are always active).  Have any of you ever parked on a hill? That is what I thought! 

When I exercise, it seems like my body doesn’t always like it at first.  I mean like I can start running and it says—erv, why don’t you quit and go and sit on the couch and eat chips.  But after about a mile it adapts and another half mile it seems to like it.  It seems to identify with what is going on and adjusts.  I wonder if that principle applies to life.  It seems like with sooo many projects, the hardest part is getting started.  At least for me it is.  I did a project that I have been putting off for several days.  I finally did it yesterday.  Once I got started, I enjoyed it.  And when I got done, I felt good.  It wasn’t near as bad as I thought, and it was sorta kinda a sense of accomplishment.  Bingo.  Can any of you identify with me?

I mentioned to a friend, Les (i.e. anybody can be a Les), the other day that I really like your pastor.  He said—Everyone does, and you aren’t telling me anything new; it’s no surprise to anyone.  Maybe just maybe a quality that he has is what is written about in Micah 8:6 (i.e. maybe that’s his identity) -- But he is human, and I bet he has to have some “feet of clay.”  Or as my mentor would say to me—erv, everyone has warts; it’s just that you just can’t see them.  All said, that could be but I still like him as does others it appears. Such is life. Byetheway, Micah 6:8 says—He has shown you, O mortal, what is good. And what does the LORD require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.

Now this is a “first world problem.”  Money changes things! Many of my golf buddies have range finders (i.e. GPS devices of different kinds to tell them the distance to the green or pin).  I never had one but sorta kinda wanted one.  Garmin has an Approach S20 wrist range finder that some of my buddies have that I like.  I had some “speaking gig money” soooo I thought I would buy one (i.e. they are just fun, but they probably won’t make a difference in my score—and really, does my golf score really matter).  Soooo they are $199 and are usually not on sale (i.e. toooo much I thought).  Well, they were on sale for $139 soooooo I bought one.  When I use it, it says—erv, you can’t hit it that far or erv, don’t kid yourself, you need more club than that at your age!  I hate that when it tells the truth (i.e. my identity).

I occasionally will stop at garage sales and look for cheap stuff for the grand kids (i.e. crazy stuff).  I get a big kick out of it.  I also enjoy visiting with the folks who are selling. This sale I stopped at while coming home from playing pickleball the other morning, was a sale of their mother's stuff.  She was going into assisted living.  I really liked this very nicely framed piece that was for sell for a ridiculously low price.  Here is probably the deal.  I looked on line and it sells for about 80 to100 dollars depending on the frame from Mohr's studio.  Their mom, probably paid about that amount as she liked what it said and believed in what it said.  Maybe the kids do not believe in what it says and wouldn't pay 2 cents for it.  That is why I bought it for $10.

Have a FUN day my friends unless you have other plans. (-:

erv

MyFreindJean says—A kindness done today is the surest way to a brighter tomorrow.

P.S. “You are the master of your destiny. You can influence, direct and control your own environment. You can make your life what you want it to be." - Napoleon Hill

tell it like it is or not

ItchieBitchie says—My obnoxious statement is not a reflection of who I really am or of my values. I was sun-stroked after a long day of windsurfing and downing a fifth of Jack. Ya right ItchieBitchie, ya right!

Should you tell it like it is or sugar coat it? A woman and her 12-year-old son were riding in a taxi in Detroit. It was raining, and all the prostitutes were standing under awnings. "Mom," said the boy, "what are all those women doing?" "They're waiting for their husbands to get off work," she replied. The taxi driver turns around and says, "Come on lady, why don't you tell him the truth?  They're hookers, boy! They have sex with men for money." The little boy's eyes get wide and he says, "Is that true Mom?" His mother, glaring hard at the driver, answers "Yes." After a few minutes, the kid asks, "Mom, if those women have babies, what happens to them?" She said, "Most of them become taxi drivers."

I have a friend who has halitosis (i.e. I don’t like them breathing down my neck but it's worse when they breath in my face) but they probably don’t know it.  Should someone tell them “what’s going on” or not?  I would guess it affects their relations with others as well.  It could be easily corrected, and it might really affect the rest of their life.  Someday they might be very thankful someone would tell them that their breath is really bad!  BUT I don’t know if it will be me!!!!! Probably not!  I will just back up a step!  Ouchy ouchy!

A friend suggested I read Shoe Dog by Phil Knight; he was the founder of Nike.  I didn’t think I would like it; I thought it would be just another egotistical person telling me how great he is.  I really liked it.  It was real and about life (i.e. it appears that he tells it like it is).  I asked a friend why he thought folks like it soooo much—he said—I assume everyone knows the story and knows the brand.  It is sorta kinda the American dream.  I suggest that you give it a read.  It is #1 New York Times Best Seller and also a 5 star on Amazon (i.e. what ever that means). 

I had a person tell me that he was working.  Usually when a person tells others they are working, they think that the other folks don’t think they are working and they are probably right.  When folks tell others they are working, they are maybe trying to convince others and themselves that they are actually working.  And when folks tell others they are working, it almost solidifies it that they are not working (i.e. trying to convince others that they are working).  ItchieBitchie says—The more they talk, the funnier it becomes; the other folks are even more certain that the person isn’t working. It is what it is! 

I read this while eating my oatmeal with half a banana on it-- “There is nothing wrong with bountiful crops or having more than one barn could hold. It all is a gift of God, who makes the sun shine and the rain fall, producing the abundant harvest. Farmers work long hours planting, harvesting, and storing into barns. Greed is something else. It’s been called the affliction of the affluent—an abundance of money, property, and material goods. God is not stingy. He created a world with “enough for everyone’s needs, but not for everyone’s greed” (Gandhi).

Chic says--In Dante’s Inferno (i.e. I never read it soooo I did—something new and different--can;t say I enjoyed it) of judgment, the greedy are boiled alive in molten gold. It’s their punishment for hoarding or spending their riches selfishly. Mercy gives. Greed grabs. It’s never satisfied. Jesus says to us, “Beware of covetousness”! —Chic Broersma ~ BUT if you don’t believe in Jesus but you believe in your neighbor GreedBallJoe, well then, you need to get out there and spend all your life making more!  More is better.  WorldC;lassLarry says—There is nuttin wrong with money (i.e. money is good), but it’s how we manage it! Many times I really wonder if I manage it correctly; I really do. It’s a struggle for me.   JoeBlow says—Money is problematic; toooo little causes problems and toooo much causes problems; but how do you know the right amount and to get to that point (i.e. money can be a trap folks)?

Maybe take this with a pinch of salt! CadillacJack asks—Can a person be tooooo genuine?  Is it better to spin the truth to make it fit the majority of the folks regardless if it is marginally true (i.e. don’t put folks on the line)?  It appears to me, folks with big positions and maybe big egos can spin the story and get by with it.  Maybe.  Also, folks who, supposedly think they are important (e.g. Phil Michelson) can do what they want and say what they want and expect folks to just accept it.  Some folks think he showed disrespect.  Does it make a difference who you are as to the results are? Are the results different for different folks? It is what it is.

I know a guy who is as useless as tits on a boar (i.e. that is a MN farmers’ expression that I learned as a little old farm boy a mile and fourth south of Roseland, MN).  Dean, a friend since we were in diapers, sent me this—The old farmstead that you grew up in is for sale again.  It looks really bad.  I walked through the house and barn; quite a mess.  Then I get this message from TheZenker (i.e. a Daunbe High classmate) -- On my way to Willmar I saw a for sale sign on your old home farm house. The place looks very overgrown, you can barely see the house and barn. But, it’s still a mile and a quarter south of Roseland. They tell it like it is. 

Oh ya, I stood up for my friend Dean and his wife Pat 50 years ago.  Dean told me that the naysayers said their marriage would never last. I kidded them about that on their 50 anniversary and his response was—we showed them!

I’m telling you the way it is.  It feels better to me.  Seems like honesty works best for me.  ANYWAY, early this spring I wrote that our daughter, Heather, was going to run in the Chicago Marathon this fall for the Team Alzheimer’s and she and her husband, James, were raising money for the charity.  Some of you gave to her.  I, Heather and James, were just overwhelmed of your generosity (i.e. you are good folks with good hearts—very touching).  In 2016 Arlene and I (along with family and friends) did the Walk to End Alzheimer’s in Des Moines and it was a GREAT experience. We are going to do it again this year (Team Mellema). I think it is pretty neat that we can do this in honor of Arlene. If any of you would like to walk with us, that would be fun. Just let me know and I can send you the link.  We plan to push Arlene on the walk again (i.e. my biggest concern is a bathroom that will work for us). Such is life.

We were in a small group church setting (i.e. having a good time).  One couple told us that they have been married for 22 years (i.e. both marriages are their second marriages from divorces).  They said it took a couple of years before they called each other by the correct names; they called each other Harry and Rosie (i.e. the names of their ex-spouses).  What a hoot! They told it like it was. 

John (i.e. anyone can be a John), a friend of friends, was up here along with his wife, visiting our friends.  We played pickleball with him (i.e. an accomplished player and instructor).  I said to him—nice shot!  He said—I will teach it to you, erv for nine ninety-nine!  He gave us a clinic that evening.  I learned and relearned some things about technique, philosophy, shots, mechanics, positions.  He showed me how to hit a cut shot that I want to learn (i.e. he suggested I change my grip to a continental grip from my eastern grip).  I am going to work on it.  I like to learn something new.  Basically, John told us—If anyone wants to get better, they must learn to play the game right, learn proper techniques, practice the shots time after time after time so the shots can be made consistently without the thought of execution. He told it like it is!  SusieQ says--A player can’t get better practicing doing it wrong.  Sounds much like life folks.  Oh, by the way, he didn’t charge us nine ninety-nine. ha ha I really enjoyed John and Phyliss.  Seem to be real folks with good hearts.

MissPerfect says in reply to ItcheiBitchie’s opening remark—Au contraire.  ItchieBitchie’s statement was probably an exact reflection of who he is and how he speaks to those who agree with him.  Alcohol, Ambien and a giant ego probably acted more like truth serum (i.e. they let him tell it like it is; at least in his head!).

Have a FUN day my friends unless you have other plans. (-:

erv

MyFreindJean says—A torn jacket is soon mended, but hard words bruise the heart of a child. ~ Longfellow

it is what it is

At the bottom of this "It's Saturday", is the link to a new podcast.  It is with two gals who are 24/7 caregivers for their husbands who have Alzheimer’s/dementia.  Our conversation is about how friends, family, church folks and the public can be of help to caregivers from a caregiver’s point of view.  

This “It’s Saturday” might produce some gasps, whoops, applause, stunned readers, disbelieve, astonishment, concern, joy, backlash, insight, laughter, amazement, puzzlement, bewilderment, head scratching, new concepts, and God only knows what else!  Soooo be prepared.  Surely don’t take me tooooo serious.  Probably DoofusEdward is the only person who will maybe understand.  Take that into consideration when reading it. And DoofusEdward (i.e. who gets seizures when he thinks) might only thinks he understands it; it is quite questionable). 

HCQ (i.e. how come question) is asked a lot by many children of their dad.  It ain’t a new question; it’s been around forever. ANYWAY, but it’s a good question I always thought.  That question seems emblematic of the whole world. So many people ask the good question, but somehow the answer keeps getting not answered by many dads (i.e. my opinion) Solomon felt that way in the book of Ecclesiastes, but he kept coming back to one basic truth. Everything in life is meaningless without a personal relationship with God, for only God can impart lasting joy to our hearts. I believe that. Here is one of many things I don’t understand—If this is the truth why doesn’t absolutely everyone want it and can’t get enough of it (i.e. like most everyone can’t get enough of sugar and food)? Approximately only one third of the world’s population proclaim to be Christians.  Is there an opposing force?  WorldClassLarry (i.e. who is a brainiac) says--There is only one corner of the universe you can be certain of improving, and that’s your own self.

It isn't that I don't remember or forgot or never knew but it's...! I was thinking the other day—I really don’t know much.  That’s just the way it is.  It is what it is.  That is very humbling to me.  Maybe someday a lot of stuff will make sense to me.  And maybe not.  I think it will.  I think there will be some big surprises.  Yes, I do.  Maybe the folks who think they know it all might not know it all.  And maybe those folks who are confused or don’t think they know it all will understand it all after all.  I don’t know.  Time will tell now won’t it.  It is what it is.  AverageJoe (i.e. who shows emotional outrage at times) says—It is very hard to tell who is great and who isn’t here on this earth (i.e. Facebook doesn’t tell me exactly but tries).  I agree AverageJoe, I think some folks are really great, but the earth’s measuring stick doesn’t.  My mentor would say to me—erv, the world’s measuring stick is how much money and power folks have.  But folks, like I said—I really don’t know much! 

I was working with an account manager of a company the other day.  At the end of the day, I must not have explained myself very well as he and I weren’t on the same page.  We both just laughed.  He told me it happens all the time; folks think they are very exact with their explanation (i.e. and maybe are to themselves) but the other person does not understand the conversation the same which results in misunderstanding and causing problems (i.e. like giving your wife or kids instructions).  It is what it is. 

The best way to learn is to ask questions my Daddy, Chester, would say. But ask the right folks (i.e. not a person who is in the same rut that you are in).  Ask folks who know something and not those who just think they know something.  Good advice.  Folks who make money off of you don’t always give you the best advice; maybe an independent person who you pay by the hour might be a better source. BUT it really does matter, if you have trust and faith in the person.  Trust and faith folks, yes, trust and faith!!!

This is what I read while eating my oatmeal with half a banana on it:  RickyRick says—"To reach your goals, you have to figure out how to maintain your enthusiasm over the long haul. Ralph Waldo Emerson said, ‘Nothing great is ever accomplished without enthusiasm.’ I believe that with all of my heart. I have found it to be true in my life. You’ve got to have passion and enthusiasm, or you’re never going to make it to the finish line.”  Now think through that folks.  How and what do you need to do to maintain your enthusiasm?  Now that could be different things to different folks. Oh ya!  ItchieBitchie (i.e. who some think is an enlightened native) says—It’s soooo easy to fall off the wagon and lose a person’s enthusiasm or passion.  One suggestion—Get around good folks!  BUT that is hard for folks if they are in a bad situation and are surrounded by bad people; that is a major change.  That is why many can’t do it.  BUT some can!  Yes they can.

Do you want something?  I mean do you want something really bad!  Are you dedicated to get what you want? Or do you want something but don’t want to put in the effort to get what you want (i.e. you would rather just sit on the couch and eat chips and hope you get what you want)? It takes a lot of enthusiasm to maintain that attitude.  Yes, it does.  SusieQ (i.e. who loves political theater) says--It’s ok to take a day off once in a while but then ya gotta get right back at it.  It is what it is!  OverTheTopFrank says-- My wife and I discovered a serious budget leak…I spent a large chunk of it in the bottomless pit known as Costco and now I have been banned; I was tooooo enthusiastic!

I did a little volunteering at our golf course recently.  I ran into a friend who does a lot of volunteering at the course.  We had some pretty serious damage to our water lines from apparent poor workmanship last fall.  He said to me--erv, it is what it is; we need to go forward; I have a hard time with the coffee drinkers who just complain but don't do anything.  Ouchy ouchy!  My friend, there are complainers and there are doers; you are a doer.  I was at breakfast with a friend the other morning and he said--erv, there are talkers and there are doers!  

I have a strong tendency to enjoy being around folks who are enthusiastic (i.e. yes, many of you folks).  I am attracted to folks who are competitive and aggressive and do it with humility (i.e. that is a hard line to know where it is—confidence and humility). Do you like to be around the shakers of the world?  Some of the shakers really aren’t that nice of folks but some are.  Many shakers are very enthusiastic, aggressive, and competitive you know.  Ok, I have a tendency also to pick my folks I enjoy being around, but I much prefer them to be enthusiastic, aggressive, competitive and humble (i.e. good folks with good, real hearts).  Does that make any sense to you?  That is what I thought.  Such is life. 

A friend/golf buddy (i.e. who I enjoy being around as much as ice cream) called me this week.  We talked how Tiger’s putting letting him down; we both think that age will do that to a person.  Age causes a lot of problems for most folks if we like it or not.  My friend (i.e. who is in his mid-70s) said he played league golf the other night and missed 7 short puts; I never use to miss one (i.e. he didn’t folks) and now I missed 7 in 9 holes.  I think he needs to take more pills!!!! It is what it is!

I have told you that I wear a Bobby Jones cap a lot.  He is one of my heroes!  Some of you have no idea who Bobby Jones was just like some of you have no idea what integrity is.  Many of you have great integrity.  In fact, if you had a cap with your name on it, I would wear it.  That is what I think of some of you.  Webster says integrity is--The quality of being honest and having strong moral principles; moral uprightness. Does that make any sense to you?  That is what I thought.  

I was riding with a golf buddy in his golf cart when he said to me—erv, "It is what it is" when I asked him about his wife’s medical situation.  He was a student of mine in high school (i.e. business law and math I think) some 45 years ago.  We got to know each other more because of golf after his retirement.  ANYWAY, he said to me—I pray for you and Arlene—soooo how do you pray—I pray that Arlene can have the best quality of life with her disease and I pray for you to have patience in taking care of her.  Folks just surprise me, and I’m amazed how great some folks are.  They just amaze me.  I wrote before about the death of my long-time business partner and friend.  I have just been amazed how many folks have showed symphony to me in his death.  It totally amazed me; many expressions of love were from folks who I didn’t except (i.e. very sincere; way different than how I thought I knew them).  Yes, we express sympathy for family, but I never have been sensitive enough to others who have lost friends.  What is also interesting to me, I think non-church goers were just as expressive of their symphony to me as church goers.  Is that crazy or what! Why do you think that is? That is what I thought. I surely haven’t been symmetric enough to folks who lost friends in the past (i.e. I now feel bad for not being more aware and sensitive).  Ouchy ouchy!

It is what it is! A friend is a very avid outdoors man.  He really likes to hunt and fish.  He showed me his basement that has many trophy fish and animals that he shot or caught all over the world.  He told me that he wanted his kids to be like him (i.e. a love and intense interest of the outdoors).  He pushed them and sorta kinda forced them even though they didn’t have a huge massive interest.  Now his grand kids and him were fishing and he said—We had more fun playing with the night crawlers than we did fishing; my attitude has changed.  Such is life.

It is what it is.  Here is another Father's Day story.  All of you will understand it differently. No question!  All of us have different memories, different circumstances, and different emotions.  It is what it is. ~   My son pulled our washing machine away from the wall to investigate why it had quit working. Standing behind the tilted-up machine, he looked over at me kind of funny-like as I sat, watching from a safe distance. His look suggested he was thinking, “Dad, you’re looking sort of old sitting there. You make me think of Grandpa. He’s gone now, and one day you’ll be gone, and I’m not real happy with that thought.” After fixing the washing machine, as he was putting some tools back in the toolbox, he asked, “Remind you of anything?” I said, “Yup, I was just thinking about that. Those were my dad’s tools.” “Yup,” he said.

Have a FUN day my friends unless you have other plans. (-:

erv

MyFriendJean says—In the matter of style, swim with the current; in matters or principle stand like a rock.

spill your guts

Folks, pay attention to this—Much of what I write is my opinion and my belief.  Sooooo don’t pay much attention to it.  I repeat, don’t get soooo riled up about what I write.  Everyone doesn’t think the same which can cause problems.  We walked the High Line by the Hudson River.  It is an old elevated rail line that was once used for meat processing and dairy product processing.  It is now a tourist attraction.  When we climbed up the steps to get to the line, there was this sign that I found quite interesting.  What are your thoughts about what is written?  That is what I thought. 

God can handle your emotions — He gave them to you, after all! He can handle your anger, doubt, fear, questions, grief, and even your complaints. Be honest; tell it to God. Get it off your shoulders. Spill your guts! Tell God exactly how you feel: “God, I hurt!” This is exactly what Job did. Job was brutally honest with God: “I can’t be quiet! I am angry and bitter. I have to speak” (Job 7:11 GNT).  AverageJoe says—Getting it off our chest sorta kinda cleanses our mind and soul and cleans a person's gut!. 

She sorta kinda spilled her guts to me.  The other day I talked to a gal who I haven’t talked to for maybe 45 years.  She was a former student way back then.  Back then she was disgruntled with the world and still is.  Crazy.  I asked her what she does now that she is retired from the postal service—I write and call my government representatives; I’m unhappy how things are going—sooo are you liberal or conservative—neither—do you like Trump—no—did you like Obama—not entirely—do you like your husband—not always!  I don’t think she will change.  She is a feisty woman alright. I gave her an opportunity to get it off her chest and she took it!  Such is life.

We were on the 2^nd green last Wednesday when a golf buddy/friend spilled his guts.  He told us that he did a stupid think and then told us (i.e. we all laughed).  Another golf buddy said—yes, that was stupid (i.e. and we all laughed again).  Then another golf buddy said—Now you did 2 stupid things; the second one is telling us the stupid thing you did (i.e. we all laughed again). I really had a good time with these guys. Youwhothinkthemostimportaantthingisthesocreandbeatingsomeone won’t understand this.  Yes, we are all competitive and probably know what we are shooting but it isn’t the most important part of the outing.  LuckieEddie says—The score is the stupid part of the game a.k.a. comparing!  A freind says--When the goner gongs, it ain't going to make much difference what your golf score is! Such is life.

I stopped and got some bread, bananas, and eggs the other morning.  I used my credit card but wasn’t really paying much attention (i.e. I can do that easy).  ANYWAY, when it says is this a debit card I pressed yes as I thought it was asking if this the right amount (i.e. I assumed).  Then it asked for my pin. That is the time I knew I messed up.  Sooooooo, I canceled it and started over.  I told the clerk—usually it’s erv’s error; I don’t like erv’s errors!  She said—I don’t like errors either unless I’m an heir in an estate; then I like to be a heir!    

I know of a person who is in poor health (i.e. life probably will end soon).  This person is not a believer but is thinking about becoming a believer (i.e. that is what getting closer to death can do to some).  But this person is struggling with accepting the “grace” of Jesus Christ as a gift (i.e. a true gift has no strings attached).  This person thinks they must earn it.  Their whole life was about power and money (i.e. it appears) and is measured by those two things (i.e. comparing to others—some think a free gift ain’t fair).  Ouchy ouchy!  “My home is in heaven. I’m just traveling through this world.” Billy Graham 

When in NYC we went to the 9/11 Museum.  We heard and read sad stories, incredible escape stories, such happy stories, heroic stories and stories of folks who died in the tragedy.  Everyone had and does have a story.  Everyone.  I got a couple of text messages from a couple of friends that were pretty thought provoking to me.  #1--You're right though, people sometimes bother me more than animals. #2--I read your column this Saturday and thought about our talk last week and how our parents played a role in how we live our lives today. It has taken me awhile to (not the 72 years here on earth) learn to be more excepting of others, their beliefs, ethnicity’s, genders, and whatever! I really would be called an independent leaning more for the down and outers.  It always helps to say! What would Jesus do, what would he say!  I get the impression he did not hang out with the mighty rich during his lifetime. Kerry and I have all we need and more. We have tithed all our years together and we have been blessed many times over. Both have had cancer, Kerry twice. We just keep plugging away!  My life was spared in Vietnam many times and I have always thought God kept me alive so could do some good for someone else on this earth. Let’s talk soon!  ~  Happenstance, na, I don’t think soooooo!  Soooo I was sweeping our drive when a long-time friend was going by in his pickup.  He stopped and talked.   What a great conversation we had.  This guy, along with his wife, point in the right direction it appears (i.e. good, real folks with good hearts—my kind of folks). 

Recently I ran into a long-time friend at the golf course.  He told me his recent story about himself and asked me if I would stop and see him.  Sooooo I did.  He was going to have some medical procedures done at Mayo (i.e. started this last Tuesday).  They will impact his life but he doesn’t know exactly how and to what degree.  He and his wife and I had a very nice talk. I like these folks.  He asked me the question—How come?  I told him I have no idea.  We probably will never know.  Life is not always fair!  The only thing that is fair is the Butler County Fair and it’s June 20-24. I told him I really care about him and will pray for him.  BUT he text me the next day and told me that he was getting the Proton beam treatment (i.e. his insurance company approved it).  Not all get this new, advance treatment.  How come he got it and others don’t?  I have no idea.  Life is not always fair.  Such is life.

Travelling with other people and travel in general can be exhilarating and exhausting. Seasoned travelers learn to take unexpected delays and opportunities in stride: this is part of the experience. Novice travelers often feel overwhelmed and anxious, unsure of how to proceed (i.e. get all bent out of shape). That is much like life (i.e. my opinion).  We need to learn to relax!  LuckieEddie says—The things I used to care to do, I’m not as interested in anymore, but I really don’t care that I have lost my interest!  I got up early the other morning and did what I enjoy doing (i.e. not what others wanted me to do but what I wanted to do).  I enjoy early morning and being by myself.  Some of you might think that is a waste of time; I think it’s a great investment for me (i.e. good for my soul, mind and heart—my opinion). Then, I washed the windows!  Such is life.

I’m going to spill my guts.  Yes, I am.  This is about Bob and Jan (i.e. the story was told to me by Randy and Galene who are mutual friends).  When I was on my respite, Arlene stayed in an assisted living facility with a dementia unit.  She ate her meals in the dining area along with the other assisted living folks.  She was eating breakfast with Bob and Jan (i.e. long-time friends).  Arlene was struggling with using the utensils.  Jan asked her if Bob could feed her. She said yes, and Bob feed her.  Bob was the carpenter who built our house some 44 years ago.  There are good folks in this world; yes, there are.  A great, touching story to me!

I talked to an old friend at breakfast the other day.  He raises show sheep.  I asked him when  the shows start—the end of June and then all summer—do the same folks show the same sheep at many of the shows—yep—do the same sheep win—no, not necessarily; depends on the judge—you mean some judges look at different qualities—maybe but it’s more who you know; if folks know the judge personally, they do better—soooo are you saying it isn’t always fair—you can call it what you want but it’s who you know; it ain’t nuttin new!  JudgeItchieBitchie says—Everyone can be bought; it’s just how many bucks will it take!!!!  I have my price!

I have an acquaintance who does dumb stuff.  He says he is sorry but then does some more dumb stuff and again says he is sorry; again, again and again.  I try to forgive him but enough is enough.  Politicians and entertainers do that tooooo and expect others to always to forgive them and then have life as it always was (i.e. just forgive me and forget about it).  NOT SOOOOOO FOLKS!  I read this in the paper soooo it must be right—Joke was on Roseanne this time!  I sure would hope soooo.  Yes, we can forgive folks and probably should but---SORRY, YOU ARE STILL FIRED! CadillacJack  says--We can’t afford to have you perform another train wreck!  Ouchy ouchy!  Your past record is one train wreck after another!  We need a new engineer!  Now Samantha Bee said some bad stuff (i.e. my opinion) and some think it’s not sooo bad.  Soooo do some get more slack than others (i.e. like who is writing the article or in sheep judging, who you know)?  Is that fair? JoeBlow says—Maybe it depends what kind of horse trader you are! Now that could be!  Such is life.

SusieQ says--It appears that many awards and glory are given to folks who are judged speculatively (e.g. nicest kid in the class, prettiest girl, best sheep, etc.) and some #1s are judged by facts (i.e. like the winner of the mile race, top sales person of the company, who hit the most home runs in the season, etc.). I understand that folks will pay huge money to buy a possible #1 hog in trying to win the 4-H grand champion at some county fair.  Money talks folks!  Such is life.

My Mom, Anna, would say to me—erv, just try to do good and then forget about it. Don’t try to do good for self-glorification; you will be disappointed; do good stuff ‘cause it is the right thing to do.  We live in a very competitive culture where many want to be recognized for doing good.  I would guess all of you have thought that you should have been recognized for your good but weren’t; others got the glory; and how about your kids not getting any glory that you thought they should?  Suggestion—Try not to be that way.  Our lives will be much happier.  Just be happy for others and their recognition.  GeorgeTheCrook says—Many folks don’t want recognition, and many do. You know which one you are. Don't kid yourself. Others know for sure if you don't think you know!  ha ha

Let you and I be the recognizers!  That’s right.  Let you and I recognize folks as to how great they are.  We all know great folks that probably won’t get their picture in the paper or on Facebook or be publicly recognized as to how great they are.  They won’t, soooo let you and I recognize them by telling them in some form (i.e. like vocally, text, email, a pat on the back or a written note).  Do it to someone who isn't getting attention (i.e. maybe someone who doesn't get many accolades).  Do you think they might appreciate it?  Of course they will. They are great folks, but many times don’t have anyone to tell them how great they are.WildWillie says—There are two kinds of folks in the world, givers and takers.  Which type of person do you think is the happiest?  SweetJane says--When you think of someone else, we are happier; that's a no brainer!  Sooooo this week, tell three folks how great they are. How do you think they will feel?  How do you think you will feel? Suck it up cupcake and let's get going!

I wrote a paragraph and now I deleted it.  I wrote it “at a spur of the moment” and now I didn’t like it.  It didn’t feel right (i.e. most of my writing is done about “it feeling right”—does that make any sense to you—that is what I thought). I like to write something one day and then reanalyze it the next day.  Many times, I modify it or delete it.  I read this while eating my oatmeal with half a banana on it--About 53 percent of grocery purchases are “spur of the moment.” CadillacJack says—It’s a higher percentage for me.  Can you tell?

Saturday question—What is in your guts today? Maybe there are days when we need a good laxative to clean our guts out.  Clean guts feel, oh sooooo good!

Have a FUN day my friends unless you have other plans! (-:

erv

MyFreindJean says—When you help someone else up the hill, you reach the top yourself.

if folks...

GeorgeTheCrook says--erv, you talk in this “It’s Saturday” like you got your mouth full!  I can’t understand a word you say.  Well folks, I’m going to put you folks who are hyper traditional extremists and you folks who are hyper progressive extremists in the spotlight.  That should be about all of you.  ha ha

If folks would do what they say, life would be a lot easier.  That is what I heard someone say the other day.  I will call you back, I will take care of it, I will fix it, I will get right to it, I will check it out and get back to you, I will be there etc.  (e.g. a friend said that some friends said they all were going to a movie at the library.  She was the only one that showed up). Rats!

Parenting isn’t always easy folks.  Kids want to do what they want when they want.  You adults were kids once and were the same.  Parents who force their kids to act and do certain things, can get some push back.  Some of it isn’t always soooo nice what the kids say.  Soooo do parents give in or stick to their guns? Early on it might be bed time, eating habits, talk, use of electronics and as they get older it changes to more and different stuff.  Well, summer is here, and school is out.  Now the schedule and expectations are changing.  It can be tough on kids and parents. MissPerfect says--If kids would just do what they are told!  Jr says—If parents would just do what they say! Such is life.

We can see the ball diamond from our sun porch.  The other day a kid about 10 dressed in his baseball garb was there alone.  He would stand by the plate and pretend to take a couple of cuts (i.e. must of missed as he got ready to swing again). Then he swung again and pretended he hit a home run and trotted around the bases and made jesters like the major leaguers do.  What a hoot to watch.  Do adults ever pretend and have some fun?  A friend told me the other day—I’m an adulterous but I don’t practice it!  Wow!

The solution to many problems isn’t more money but how the money is spent.  ItchieBitchie says--Folks have to behave differently.  JoeBlow says—I get tired of the folks who are always complaining that they are underpaid because of their race, gender or whatever even though the truth is some probably are.  Complaining is boring to be around; now action and innovation and a work ethic is exciting to be around (i.e. my opinion).  A solution for some is to be creative and do something to create more income if that is what they want.  I was around a person recently that wants to do just that.  We kicked around some ideas of how they could do that.  This person is thinking.  He’s not complaining folks, he is being proactive. EntrepreneurPete says—That probably will take risk and many folks don’t want to take risk.  Many ideas don’t work out and result in failure.  Folks don’t like failure.  Maybe for many, it’s easier just to complain!  ha ha

The risk and reward concept really makes me think.  Our culture changes that perspective.  Playing high school football has risk and reward.  You might have permanent heat exhaustion effects the rest of your life, you might have permanent knee injuries or have permanent brain damage.  Just maybe and you might not.  But when you are 50 and drinking a few beers with the boys, you can talk about how great you were and how you were the runner-up of Big March Conference and you averaged 6 tackles a game.  I’m not opposed to football but there is risk and reward.  I played fb in high school. I wasn’t really that good but because of fb, I was recruited to play in college (i.e. I probably would not have gone to college if it wasn’t for fb.  I never did paly fb in college but did play bb.  It was because of fb that maybe I got a BA and a MA. BUT I also got some bad knees that makes me use supports when I play pickleball.  Because of fb I met Arlene and…and…and…and…   It’s called risk and reward!

I read this while eating my oatmeal with half a banana on it--How are you feeling today? Are you anxious, sad, struggling with sinful thoughts, or angry at someone? Or do you feel content, blessed, and loved? What is the inner state of your heart and mind? One of the blessings that comes through faith in Jesus Christ is peace. Even in a world filled with violence and warfare, a busy home life, or a stressful time at work, we can have inner peace. What do you think of that?  That is what I thought.  For those of you who don’t believe in Jesus Christ, that is ok.  That is up to you.  I probably will like you regardless.  I don’t like some Christians soooo well and some I like a lot.  It’s pretty much the same with non-Christians.  BUT, I think this Jesus guy has some possibilities (i.e. he gives us some 7,000 promises in the Bible) to think about (i.e. I believe in Jesus but I’m just a little old farm boy from a mile and fourth south of Roseland, MN).  I like folks who do what they say; I believe Jesus does!

Here is the ultimate for some of you (i.e. it has arrived).  Yes, it is here.  It is called Death Wish.  A coffee that is a self-proclaimed strongest coffee in the world.  It boasts between 600 and 700 milligrams of caffeine in a 12-ounce cup.  That’s twice as much caffeine as a cup of Starbucks’ Blond roast or 5 times as much as a standard brew.  Do you think it “will do what is says?” LuckieEddie says—Now that aught a charge me up.  I will be real hyper alright.  SusieQ says—Who needs Jesus when you have Death Wish!!!!

RickyRick says--There is a difference between mourning and moaning, between weeping and wallowing. A loss can deepen me, but that doesn’t mean it can define me. A loss is a part of my maturity but not my identity. You believe that?  That is what I thought.  My Daddy, Chester, told me several times what is in the pic.  What do you think of that?  That is what I thought.

Just do what I say!  Have you heard parents say to their kids—You have to do what I say?  And sometimes kids just do what their parents do.  As the saying goes--Like father, like daughter and daughter in law?  Well, we all had a hot dog at the Yankee Stadium.  LuckieEddie says—Take care of your kids as someday maybe they will take care of you. A friend told me that he had his family together in down-town Chicago.  He said he use to tell his kids to follow me but now his kids say, dad follow us.  I had the opportunity to take couple of my favorite gals to The Big Apple last weekend (i.e. our daughter Heather and daughter-in-law Jessica—they are sweethearts).  They were my tour guides and we did anything they wanted to do except I wanted to go to a Yankee game and have a hot dog with sauerkraut on it (i.e. they did toooo).  Sooooo I just followed them around NYC and held out my plastic.  We had a blast (i.e. an experience that will not and cannot ever be reproduced).  Incredible!

I always think that New Yorkers are brass, rude, aggressive and in your face.  This time I didn’t notice it as much.  Either they have changed, or I have become brass, rude, aggressive and in their face!   ha ha   Several times when I was standing close to Jessica or Heather, a New Yorker guy would say to me –Is that your wife—I would shake my head yes or say ya—they would say—wow and give me the thumbs up.  It just made me laugh.  When Jessica and I were getting into our hired car to take us to LaGuardia, I tipped the bellhop and he gave the tip to a street guy walking by.  I said to him—You are a nice guy.  He just raised his hands and shrugged his shoulders.  See, New Yorkers aren’t as bad as I stereotyped them---MAYBE!  Soooo, when we get to LaGuardia, I pay the driver and gave him a tip.  He shook my hand with a double hand shake and said—God bless you to me twice.  I didn’t think New Yorkers had a heart or faith.  MAYBE they do! Maybe he thought I had to be very rich to get such a young, beautiful woman! What a hoot!

Have a FUN day my friends unless you have other plans.

erv

MyFreindJean says—We live in the present, we dream of the future, but we learn eternal truths from the past.

P.S. Frugality is enjoying the virtue of getting good value for every minute of our life, energy and from everything we have the use of. Suck it up cupcake and let's get going!