ya gotta be kiddin'

You can’t imagine how I worry about you nimrods!  Really.  I lose sleep over you! 

#wimp (i.e. hashtag) A buddy is doing an Iron Man Competition today in Houston (i.e. swim 2.4 miles, bike 112 miles and run 26.2 miles--that is in one day folks).  He was telling me that it’s one third physical, one third mental and one third nutritional. You gotta be kiddin’!  And I slowly run 3 miles and I’m tired. I’m a wimp! He’s not! No question. He lost 42 pounds!  Wow.

Underwear?  When I wrote about what kind of underwear folks might wear a few weeks ago, I got an email from a buddy (i.e. male).  Do you think I wear underwear and if soooo what kind?  I responded—yes athletic.  Recently I was playing golf with him and on the first green, he pulled down his pants and showed us his underwear.  What a hoot!  Some of you say—Ya gotta be kiddin’!  I don’t know if girls would do that, would they? BikiniBarbie says--Give me a six pack of Bud Light and I might! Well my buddy was the Iron Man guy!  A rare guy!  Huzzah! Saturday question--Do any of you go commando?

You got to be kiddin'! Iowa's basketball coach was asking about a young high school player from southern Florida as to why he was not being recruited.  He had super athletic ability and a great body. His high school coach said—Well, he did smoke some marijuana and did

burn some bridges along the way; but you can talk to him if you want.  Soooo the coach talked to the young man and asked him about smoking some marijuana and about burning some bridges.  The kid said—Ya, I admit that I did smoke some marijuana but I didn’t burn any bridges; I'm really not into fire!  And his ACT score was what? I heard he went to to our friends to the north, The University of MN!  ha ha  HerkyTheHawkeye says--Probably that bridge burner will beat us for the next 4 years!  Such is life.

Don't make a spectacle of yourself erv! # wimp EasyJohn says--erv, you need to recompense your thoughts!  Recently, I was disappointed with a couple of folks.  I thought they should have acted differently to me.  I asked a friend what he thought—he said—erv, just forget about it—soooo I asked my golf buddies what they thought—they said—erv, just forget about it.  I guess I heard it—I need to forget about it. RipsterBud says--Don’t over do it erv, you are getting’ a little over the top—settle down—cool your jets--you ain’t God almighty—you’re just a little old farm boy from a mile and a fourth south of Roseland, MN—sooo suck it up Roseland Rosebud; rub some dirt on it; buck up you wimpy wimp!  ItchieBitchie says—erv, why do you even care how those guys act or think; it’s no skin off your back; you don’t have to associate with them.  Besides, they might be right and you might be wrong.  Could me!   I'll put that experience in my back pocket for future reference. Such is life!

Sooo are you involved in hipsterism?  LudicrousHarry says--Trend setters they are, or at least they think they are.  OldTimeHerman says--The old classic approach is always popular with a certain segment of folks (e.g. like the old classic blue pin strip shirt with the old classic kaka pants).  But the real target of retail is you the hipsters (e.g. the new Apple I-watch type maybe).  I think it’s sooooo interesting that one person (i.e. in the holy elite group of hipsters) can wear something and it’s really neat and another person (i.e. a wannabe hipster) could wear the same stuff and the peer group click will say--Are you kidding me!  I actually like the folks that don’t really care.  They probably have more confidence than the hipsters.  But I don’t know.  Maybe the trendsetters are just trying to intimidate the other folks.  Could be!  But I really don’t know.  But it appears that it’s more expensive to be a hipster.  Could be.  But I don’t know. Years ago I was on a board with a guy who was form New York.  He was worth maybe $50 million.  He would buy his ties on the street for $2 but would pay a huge massive amount of money for a good dinner (i.e. he always looked for value for his $).  Really. I remember him getting off the plane, I think in Salt Lake City, wearing an old pair of blue jeans that had paint on them besides some holes.  The next day he looked like a million dollars.  He was not a hipster!  But maybe in his own way.  But you know what, either way, it appeared he didn’t really care.

Well eat my shoes!  I recently had a friend ask me—erv, why do you keep that of old golf cart (i.e. 1985); why don’t you buy yourself a new one.  A golf buddy won’t ride with me in my cart.  I think he thinks it’s below him (i.e. he really makes me laugh—I think he thinks he’s a hipster). I think he has pejorative thoughts of me. Hey, she (i.e. my golf cart) is sorta kinda a classic (i.e. like a 1932 Ford deuce coupe that the Beach Boys sang about).  Their are soooo many memories connected with that sucker and besides, it just feels good to me. I really don’t need to or care to impress anyone.  It’s just me maybe.  Obviously it’s not for others.  That doesn’t bother me.  Why I’m that way?—Scientists are still looking into that!  And you know what folks—I’m 69 years old and if you guys don’t like my taste of golf carts, I have had plenty of time to learn what to tell ya and also have had plenty of time to learn to tell ya where to go!  Such is life.

Change colors!  An animal that can change color but is the same animal I truly like, appreciate, look up to and respect. (e.g. folks who can be a country hick or just an average Joe one day and a hipster or professional person the next or have the look of a country flower lady one day and a triathlete or doctor the next).  A guy was telling me that he was at The Living History Farm in Des Moines with his family.  His wife came back from the john and said she talked to the nicest guy, down to earth guy (i.e. had the greatest time).  He asked who he was—I don’t know; didn’t ask him; he is standing over there—it was Fred Hoiberg, IA Sate men’s’ basketball coach a.k.a. the Mayor doing a commercial.  I really like that when folks are just real folks (i.e. aren’t all puffed up).  Down to earth.  A friend told me that he was the caddy for a foursome in a fun raiser golf tourney.  Their feature player was Ben Jacobson, UNI’s men’s basketball coach.  He was sooo excited about his new pickup and wanted to show it to them when they got back.  They thought it would be a brand new pickup with all the bells and whistles.  It was just an average, but clean 2005? Ford F150. Great character (i.e. but that is my opinion).

Zinore

You got to be kiddin'! LuckieEddie says--Has anyone ever asked you to do something that seems totally ridiculous? The very suggestion of their idea may have brought laughter for proposing the idea.  Had breakfast with a friend (i.e. he has a good heart and is a giver) the other morning.  We talked about mission giving.  He wonders how much good our giving does (i.e. how much bang for the buck we are getting—cost effective).  He was wondering if we should maybe pay folks to come to church.  It would help our declining attendance, increase the quality of life for some, and also might enlighten them.  Soooooo how much do you think we would have to pay—some would come for $10 a Sunday and others would maybe want more.  It would be negotiable.  We could have specials like the cable companies do and maybe run weekly adds like HyVee does.  We could also have bundle plans.  GerogeTheCrook says—It just might work; money drives most everything; it’s all about the money.  Now we give money to folks and have no idea if they buy beer with our money or travel the world.  We get scammed it seems sometimes (i.e. my friend thinks he has).  We have no idea what Zinogre does with the money we give him.  Huh, interesting. 

Rare! I gave blood the other day.  As the phlebotomist  pulled the needle out of my arm and was attaching the information to my bag of blood, she said—I have only seen “Rare” on one other bag of blood all the years I have worked here.  Another phlebotomist who has drawn my blood several times said—He’s rare alright!  As my blood was being drawn, there was a lady who was on the bed direct in front of me giving as well.  We were only maybe 15 feet apart and were basically face to face. She was a senior of maybe 68, probably a 7 as far as facial looks, probably a 8.5 as far as body looks (i.e. slim and fit), probably a 9 as far as dress (i.e. tastefully classic but moderate), probably a 10 as far as poised and happy and polite and nice).  Of course this is all my opinion folks and from glancing at her a few times.  Sooo when I am done I go to the canteen and she joins me (i.e. she only drinks water).  She starts small talk about how windy it is and how she doesn’t like to bike when it’s soooo windy.  We talk about biking and I ask her what are two of her favorite bike rides—Southern France in the wine country and the Appian Way.  She was very humble and tasteful about talking about it.  She asks me my favorite rides—trail along Lake Michigan in Chicago and the ride we did in Holland ‘cause it was just soooo much fun as Arlene rode on the back side-saddle (i.e. it was a hoot).  I said to her—You really seem to be a happy person—I try to be.  I think she was a rare person.  Another rare person I met was a 19 year old gal who has already given a gallon of blood.  I applauded her. She ain’t no wimp! #wimp Soooo folks, be rare.  Be happy and give blood.  It’s a great combination! 

On your left!  That is a term used when biking.  When folks pass a slower biker they say that as a warning.  I get passed a lot soooo I’m use that statement (i.e. I’m a #wimp).  SusieQ says—In my life, it seems that folks are also passing me (i.e. on your left).  It seems like they are all better than me (i.e. at least it looks that way on facebook).  They sometimes make me feel inferior.  Heather and James like to bike with their family.  Heather pulls little Jimmer in a cart behind her bike (i.e. quite a load for a little gal—she’s a lot tougher than me).  Erin rides behind James on a buddy bike.  ANYWAY Heather says she hears it a lot—On your left!  Some of you folks are pulling pretty big loads in life.  It’s a tough pull.  Yes, folks are passing you on the left.  I encourage you to keep pulling as hard as you can.  Don’t be intimidated by those who say—On your left.  You know your situation and you know what has to be done.  Just do it.  LuckieEddie says—I think I’m a wimp compared to others. #wimp Such is life.

I volunteered the other day.  When I got done I went to the Waffle Stop for my regular pecan waffle and to read the Des Moines Register.  There were two pastors in the booth next to me.  One said to the other—I have a lady in our congregation that is demon possessed; I really think so!  Saturday question—Are there folks who are demon possessed?  Soooo the Waffle Shop changed the brand of syrup.  I don’t like the new brand.  I told the manager when I was leaving that I didn’t like it. Well, I probably won’t come back if you don’t offer the old brand.  As I left I heard him mumble to an employee something like—I think he’s demon possessed!  You gotta be kiddin’!  Such is life.

Just for me (i.e. maybe)! I read this last Saturday while eating my oatmeal with half a banana on it--I've learned that often God will send a message, an event or a sign for just one person. It may not make much difference to you but it makes a huge difference if YOU are the one it is for.  Do you believe that. I also got an email from a pickleball buddy that touched me that same morning.  Just receiving it from him did just that.  And he says he doesn't believe in God (i.e. to what degree I don't know--he says that stuff is for the weak; folks who can't handle stuff on their own--#wimps).  He is exactly right--God is for those who can't handle stuff on their own and I'm one of those.  ANYWAY he touched me and that's just the way it is.  His email was special.  He is special. He has a special motor! We have a neat relationship. Such is life.

HowardJordanInfidel says--I'm not a believer; its not for me.  It's your call HowardJordanInfidel.  Manny Pacqiao and Rickie Fowler are believers.  They don't seem to be a wimps but they could be.  I got a request from a guy to be added to my blog email list.  His profile shows that he is a very capable, successful business man.  It also said--I'm a believer.  He surely doesn't seem to be a wimp but could be!  But obviously, those guys think they need God. I asked an AZbuddy about his experience with AA and a Higher Power. This is what he said--erv, I have not had a drink since August 21, 2002................about 12 and a half years ago. One of the key elements of AA is the belief in in higher power, who most of us  (AA members), take to be God. The second of the "12 Steps" states: "Came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity"..................and the third step goes on: "Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood him". So the answer to your question is that virtually every successful AA member believes in a higher power, and that his/her higher power is essential to their sobriety. Since some of these folks (a small percentage in my opinion) do not believe in God as a person or being, the definition of a higher power is left as a personal matter. But for even those few............the importance of a Higher Power is of utmost importance, since most of us realize that we were unable to conquer this insidious addiction on our own. AA is, for sure, a spiritual program, but not necessarily a religious one. Personally, I take the AA program as another aspect of my relationship with God,........a very important one.  CrazyMarvin says--Maybe those guys are just wimps #wimps erv.  Could be but I don't think soooo folks. My AZbuddy is one of my heroes. He's special like many of you guys.  

Only one thing matters! MissPerfect (i.e. she’s a regular Hindenburg, full of gas which produces a huge massive explosion) says—At some time the clock will strike midnight nimrods and the dance will be over!  If you are ectotherm, now might be a good time to change. I don’t think I’m kidding folks. Tick tick tick!  As a friend says—When the bonger bongs, there is only One thing that matters!  Our earthly life is all done folks (i.e. ain’t for the wimpy #wimp).  They might throw your earthly dead body in the cooker (i.e. they set the cooker temperature between 1,600 and 1,800 degrees—it burns up even the toughest nimrods).  I really think death is toooo final (i.e. just like a 3 foot putt).  It should be the best 2 out of 3.  LuckieEddie says--That makes perfect sense to me! ChowderHeadPercilla (i.e. who is teetering on tilt) says--Ya gotta be kidding erv!  How would that work anyway? Da!

Have a FUN day my friends unless you have other plans. (-:

erv

MyFriendJean says—Keep your fears to yourself , but share your inspirations with others.