Thanks for the advice SouthDakodaKid!
She is a college friend of Arlene and mine from good ol’ Northwestern College
(i.e. a good person with a good heart; my kind of person). I haven’t seen her since maybe our marriage
some 51 years ago. She stood up for
Arlene. We got reacquainted by technology as she has an interest in Arlene’s
condition. ANYWAY, in a recent email she
said some stuff and then gave me this advice--erv, please also stay true to yourself,
and care for yourself with continued things in your life that keep you
positive. I’m sitting in our sun porch this
early Sunday morning thinking about that advice. Taking care of Arlene the best
I can and taking care of myself soooo I can do that is rather a two-edge
sword. That can be a fine line in my
head at times (i.e. I have a tendency to cheat on taking care of myself
sometimes; just maybe). WorldClassLarry says—Live consists not in holding good
cards, but in playing those you hold well.
Chet and Jessica once again organized the “Mellema Team” to participate
in the The Walk to End Alzheimer’s in Des Moines on August 24. This is the third walk for “Team
Mellema.” If any of you would like to
contribute to this cause, please go to the link. Hopefully someday soon this terrible disease
can be cured or prevented. We would be glad to have you walk with us tooooo.
JoeBlow says--Not doing what is right only cheats yourself. “A really humble man…will not be thinking
about humility, he will not be thinking about himself at all.”--C. S. Lewis RickyRick says--The conflict might be 99.99
percent the other person’s fault. But you can always find something to confess!
Maybe it was your poor response, even if it came out of defensiveness. Maybe it
was your attitude. Maybe it was the way you walked away. You have weaknesses in
your life that others see clearly but you’ve never seen. Those are your blind
spots. You have weaknesses you’re clueless about. That’s why you need to come
to conflict resolution with a humble heart and begin with your own faults. ItchieBitchie says--If we don’t resolve
conflict, we are cheating ourselves of a happier life. JoeSmuck says--Whatever I did to hurt any of
you or make any of you uncomfortable (i.e. I have blind spots), it was my
fault; I’m sorry (i.e. now that is a carta blanche catchall if I ever saw one—that’s
like asking God to forgive all me sins, Amen).
I got this email from a friend this week--We tried something
different. We were really humble for two weeks. But nobody noticed!! So we
reverted back to our old ways. I LOL
I read
in the paper, soooo it must be right, that we all have a world view. But, the paper said, most of the word views
are now based on race and gender. I made
a mistake and I’m sorry; I am. At
pickleball, I apparently hit a ball too hard at a gal and she didn’t like
it. I will not do that again let me tell
you. I like this person; she’s my friend.
Why would I do that to upset her. My bad! Pickleball is not my life; it’s not that important to me! A friend tells me that I take things tooooo tenderly; I have
to get tougher. I let things bother me
tooooo much. I didn’t like it that I
hurt her feelings. I will ease up on my
velocity when I hit to her. She will be happy and I will feel better (i.e. a
win-win). You can’t beat that! And you know what? I’m fine with that. I just
need to find the correct velocity for each person. Now that could be
tricky! ha ha I need one of those wrist reminders like the
quaterbacks wear.
A person, who works retail part time, says that one minority
group is by far the leaders in shoplifting in their store. Ya, we are not suppose toooo profile but the
reality is what it is folks. These folks
really cause problems for this particular retail chain as these shoplifters
won’t admit they are wrong and threaten and some cases cause legal and physical
problems (i.e. they seem to feel that they are entitled to shoplift). The retailers are caught in a catch 22 a.k.a.
paradoxical situation. Have any of you
ever been caught in a catch 22? Those
situations are not much fun. Do you
compromise your values and ethics? I
took an ethics class at UNI. I enjoyed
it but also found out in the real world that some folks don’t operate by good
ethics. But some do. Sooooo, what determines if we are going to
use good ethics or not? Saturday question--Are you an ethical person? Are we
cheating ourselves?
Maybe I actually
cheat myself and others a lot. Maybe
sooooo. I have a tendency to think
others think like me and they always don’t.
I do not make myself clear in communicating. Maybe I’m toooo much in the
abstract (i.e. like I smear things, I’m a smudge, and folks can’t figure it out
what I’m saying). I had a package sent
to me and it got in a loop. It went from
one post office to another than back the first one several times. It did this for 3 weeks. Crazy!
I tracked it and it was a circus of sorts. I finally called the clerk at our local post office
(i.e. she is soooo nice). She toooo
looked at the tracking; called the post office that it currently was at and had
them send it to our post office. They
said that the address was smeared which caused the problem (i.e. not clear;
couldn’t read the address and zip code). Such is life.
I personally think some churches and some Christian
denominations are cheating themselves and cheating God. But that is my opinion. I was talking to a couple of my golf
buddies/friends by the ninth green recently. They told me that the churches they attend
are really growing including many young folks and young couples. Recently having breakfast with a friend the
other morning, he told me that the church/denomination they attend, mostly
don’t talk about the real issue (i.e. Jesus) anymore; the church sounds more
like a Democratic National Convention.
He told me that his wife no longer wants to go to church. Ouchy ouchy! Daniel Webster, the great
statesman of other years, was once asked, “Mr. Webster, what is the most
sobering, searching thought that ever entered your mind?” Without hesitancy,
the staunch statesman replied, “My personal accountability to God.”
I talked to a neighbor on my way to church Sunday. He was picking up sticks in his yard. I asked him what he was going to do today (i.e. obviously not going to church)—going to
see my mom; she has been in the dumps for two years now since my dad died; she
can’t get out of it; I tell her that she needs to snap out of it; it’s time;
she can’t seem to do it. I told her dad
would not want her to be this way. He
would want you to go forward; you are cheating yourself of life.
I pulled my hamstring muscle really bad a couple of years ago. I attempted to play golf but had to change my
swing and it became very jerky and I swung soooo I didn’t want to feel the
hurt. It screwed up my swing. It was very hard to get out of that bad habit. But I had a crazy thing happen to me this
spring. I stopped at a garage sale as I
saw a trimmer on a pole that I’m looking for.
The guy was a neat guy and we had soooo much fun together. He had these golf trainers that I swung and
told him I would buy one (i.e. he had them priced at $4 each). I asked him which one I should buy—he said—I
have soooo much stuff here that I want to get rid of, soooo take them both for
$5. I bought both. I have really enjoyed them (i.e. I really
like them as I can swing them in the house—multi-task). They have changed my rhythm a.k.a. temple
which has really improved my swing which seems to have improved my game (i.e.
made it much more enjoyable). They have
given me renewed hope—There is no medicine like hope, not incentive sooo great,
no tonic soooo powerful as the expectation of something better tomorrow. Hope is soooo powerful in our lives; where do
we get our strongest Hope? JoeBlow says—Geez Louise, I don’t know! Well, JoeBlow,
Jesus is my Hope--Hope gives us Joy! A friend who is an accomplished
businessperson told me that if you have a person in your team that is not a
good person a.k.a. a snake, a clown, well, it will drain the team’s joy. It
appears that the presence of a snake/clown can be applied to many aspects of
our lives. Sooooo what do we do to get
rid of those snakes/clowns? What even seems worse is when it appears that we
can’t see a way to get rid of them (i.e. we’re stuck with them).
A friend talked to me recently. He is now 70. He grew
up in a hard-working family which struggled having enough money (i.e. sounds
like many families of that time or even today). He worked on the line at
Deere soon after high school and has been retired for some time. He said they
did well financially. They built a new house and told me they are very
comfortable. He is a saver and frugal. He told me that he had to
learn it all on his own as his parents didn't teach him anything. They
didn't know anything about money. Three of his siblings can't retire as they
have no money. I told him he was a successful person. Sooooo I
asked him why he managed his money better than some of his siblings. He
told me that he decided to put his trust in a person who could help him as
he didn't have the ability or the knowledge to manage money. I found a
person I trusted and that is what I did. Saturday question—Why did
he do that and not some of his siblings?
I have no idea. What do you think? That is what I thought.
How important is it to teach children some good stuff about
a variety of stuff? ItchieBitche (i.e.
who can at times can be as soothing as a massage and other times can be as
disruptive as a ganglion cyst) says—First of all we have to decide what is good
stuff! It appears that is a huge massive advantage to children if they are
taught and exposed to stuff like money management, morals, values etc. Children might not agree with their parents’
ideas and might even be better off not following their advice but it is still
good to tell children of your experiences about these issues (i.e. my
opinion). I think we are cheating
ourselves and them by not doing this). A friend told me that they are going on
a family vacation and are discussing a different topic every night after the
grandkids go to bed. Wow! I really like that. I will be very interested to how that
goes.
Are you or have any of you been married to a person who was been
taught or has/had different money management ideas than you do (e.g. one’s a saver
and one’s a spender)? How did that
go. That is what I thought. One doesn’t
care and the other one does. That too is
usually trouble. A friend told me that
his wife was raised in a family that spent everything and they lived from week
to week. He said it was a real battle
for her to change. She did but it was
not easy (i.e. she had to change her normal ). GeorgeTheCrook says—It ain’t
what you make but what you save. And
what are you saving it for? Are you cheating yourself out of certain things soooo
your kids can do stuff that you couldn’t and maybe stuff you don’t even approve
of? CadillacJack says--Put limits on
your wants and stick to your needs.
Here
is an idea—Give support and be thankful for support. I had a wrist that really bothered me. I think it was because the repetition when I
use it in lifting Arlene. It got pretty
sore (i.e. I have a tendency to not to do anything about until it really
bothers me). I was riding bike and ever
bump I went over it would hurt. I
said—This is crazy. I use knee supports
when I play pickleball and they have relieved much of my knee problems (a.k.a. very
big help from some support). Sooooo I
stopped and bought a wrist support (i.e. some of my golf buddies call them
devices or a gimmicks but they all seem to wear them). You know what, it has really helped me (i.e.
another help from some support). Sooooo
I wonder if and when we support others if it helps that much----maybe it’s a
big help! JoeBlow says—Maybe we will
never know. I say thanksamillion to you
folks for all your support; muchas gracias; . It has
really helped Arlene and me. Personally, I think, we cheat ourselves when we
don’t support others and when we aren’t thankful for support of others. Here is
just one example that which sorta kinda came out of the blue (i.e. very
supportive a.k.a. uplifting).
Have a FUN day my friends unless you have other plans. (-:
erv
MyFriendJean says—If you lighten the way for others, you’ll
never be in the dark yourself.
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