hot spots

When I think of a hot spot the first thing I think about is a fire when the firefighters look for the hot spots to stop the fire.  We all have hot spots that get our attention in positive ways and negative ways I would guess.  And they might be different for different folks I would guess. Probably the #1 worldly hot spot is money and then maybe power, but I really don’t know.  SusieQ says--Maybe love ranks up their toooo. What do you think?  BigTena says—I think food is another one I like!

A friend asked me what my hot spots are.  Wow! No one ever asked me that before.  One hot spot that I have learned to appreciate being in the Valley of the Sun this last winter is the emotion of being loved and loving.  I have seen and talked to many folks who are lonely at different levels.  I appreciate and bask in the feeling of being loved by folks such as family and friends and a special person and loving them back. Part of being loved and loving is having folks care about me and also me caring about them.  It’s huge massive to me. One hot spot that gets me excited on the negative side is seeing folks getting taken advantage of (i.e. that really hurts me, it can tear my heart out, particularly the underprivileged).

When in FL I would get up early and go for a walk. A couple of mornings there was this maybe 70-year-old guy sitting in the lobby, just sitting there. Sooo the next morning I sat down and talked with him. I asked Jim why he is just sitting in the lobby—I’m waiting for my wife—waiting for your wife, I don’t get it—I get up at about 4:30 and she gets up about 8:30 sooooo I just sit and wait for her—you do this all the time—ya, at home in New Jersey I sit on the patio and watch my friends, the deer, a fox and a couple eagles each morning—how long have you been doing this—12 years.  He said—I really love my wife. Soooo is this love or crazy? Love does affect us differently. Have you ever been in love? Are you in love? Have you thought you were in love but weren’t really? Have you didn't know you were in love but were? CrazyMarvin says--Love does make us want to do crazy things but it's such a great feeling!  

There are a lot of ways for a man to show his wife that he loves her. Oh ya! Frank told me, erv, I haven’t talked to my wife for three months—really, how come—I love her soooo much that I didn’t want to interrupt her!

CadillacJack says--“Maybe you’ve heard the tongue-in-cheek admonition ‘Be careful what you pray for—you might get it.’”  Sooooo, I asked my special friend if she would write about her hot spots.  She said she would (i.e. that was some time ago but she stuck to her commitment) soooooo here we go!  Personal hot spots.. interesting to think about both positives and negatives. I generally describe hot spots as things that happen which trigger strong responses. We all react differently based on our beliefs, values, and experiences, so one event might trigger a strong response in one person yet not affect the next person. My positive hot spots usually are usually related to family and friends and fill me with joy. When my son-in-law’s cancer went into remission, when I play with my great grandchildren, when my grown children are happy and fulfilled, when I feel love again after my dear husband’s death are some examples. I know it’s a positive hot spot when joy fills me so full that I overflow with laughter or happy tears. That spot is right in my heart and soul. On the other hand, my negative hot spots can bring anguish and grief when the trigger is a family member or good friend who is suffering.  I have to watch that when that hot spot is targeted I don’t let it debilitate me. Triggers such as social injustice, homelessness, bad politics, disasters, and world conditions bring emotions like sadness, anger, deep concern, sometimes calling me to action, but more often result in feelings of helplessness. As a younger person, I was too quick to react, causing anger that was not helpful, as in fight or flight. Maybe it was my red hair. As I’m graying, I’ve learned to manage my hot spots better, take a step back and think about the situation. I think about whether I can make a difference or is it simply draining my energy. We have options. So is there such a thing as cold spots?

This isn’t really a hot spot but it might be!  It is folks who are not open minded; they sorta kinda get under my skin.  Do you like to be told what to do or preached to?  I don’t think anyone likes to be preached tooooo but some folks think they know everything and preach like they do; some do think that way let me tell ya! haha We are all independent folks, and all make up our minds even though maybe we are influenced by much stimuli (i.e. some we don’t even know about)!  It appears to me that when folks make their own decisions and take their own actions, it is better.  We all make our own beds but then we have to sleep in them. But we don’t always like other folks’ actions and decisions.  Maybe we should think about being more tolerant and accepting of others.  At times this can be hard toooooo stomach!  It’s like giving a gift with strings attached! Then it isn’t really a gift anymore but a business transaction.  ItchieBitchie says—Yabut erv, it is soooo hard to watch some of the decisions our children and friends are making! How can they be soooo radical! Could it be that we are the radical ones? MissPerfect says--Who What Me? Never, not me! Soooo one afternoon on our mission trip it was slow as there weren’t any folks at our site to interview. I was sitting there and fell asleep in my chair. One of our captains took a picture of me.  She thought I was going to fall out of my chair and get hurt—I texted her and said—Who what me!

Alfred Lord Tennyson once wrote, “A lie that is half-truth is the darkest of all lies.” Certainly, it can be one of the most difficult to squelch (i.e. a real hot spot). You can refute a blatant lie with the facts, but a half-truth lives on in suspicion and innuendo, persisting despite your best efforts to silence it. Have you ever been told a half-truth and got hurt from it.  I like real folks with good hearts.  Half hearted folks not soooo much.  It’s maybe another hot spot of mine.

Sooooo when I got home from my mission trip in FL I went to our post office in our little town of Aplington to pick up my mail.  Sparky the postmaster, that is what I call her as she is sooooo sparky and nice, said--erv, where have you been, I was worried about you. I was ready to do a wellness check on you in your house--oh, I filled out a hold mail but something must have happened--don't do that to me erv.  That's small town Iowa in Butler County.

Sooooo we were going down I-85 near Atlanta and Larry gave me advice about a hot spot he thinks I and Doris, my kid sister (i.e. his wife) have.  He thinks we have a “show me” attitude. It’s an attitude that we are sorta kinda pessimistic.  He sorta kinda wonders if we wonder if it’s going to happen; we want to see it first.  He thinks it’s maybe because our parents died when we were quite young, and it really impacted us like being a big disappointment and we have that in our heads subconsciously.  Could be!  He’s pretty darn smart let me tell ya!  Soooooo he thinks I should change my attitude about a situation I’m in to what Admiral David Glasgow Farragut once said--“Damn the torpedoes, full speed ahead.” That's not just his opinion but his honest opinion!

Warren, there aren’t tooooo many Warrens but there are some good ones let me tell ya, tells of a frontier town in which a horse-drawn wagon with a little boy was racing through the streets. A young man risked his life to stop the horse and save the child. The rescued child grew up to become a lawless man and one day stood in a court in front of a judge--the now-grown young man who had saved his life. On the basis of their prior relationship, the convicted man pled for mercy. The judge responded, ‘Once I was you savior, but now I am your judge.’ I sentence you to your just punishment. Soooo think through that will ya! That might make your ulcer act up!

Do you and I have erosion in our lives? When I got back home, I found a lot of erosion in my ground cover area of my yard. There must have been a lot of ran. Maybe the erosion in our lives is something we always don’t notice until it has been going on for a long time and then we have a “Grand Canyon” which is pretty difficult to correct without some really major work. I mean major! It appears to me that love is a major force that can correct erosion in our lives.  What do you think?  That is what I thought.

When I got home and before I leave again this morning for a family get-to-gather, I felt that I had a lot to do around my house. I sorta kinda felt a little anxious. But what I did first in the morning was my mediation/devotions and then went for a long walk on the golf course. I needed to get my head right first. Talk about not having my head right. When in FL near one of our interview locations was a thrift store. My kid sister, Doris, bought some hand painted Delft from Holland.  She thinks she got a bargain (i.e. as long as she thinks she did that is all that counts), and she really liked it; she sorta kinda collects this stuff.  She was soooo excited.  Sooo she took it out of the box and showed me.  I said “oh!” I should of got more excited. I disappointed her. I bet if she would have shown it to another women, they would have said all kinds of good stuff even though maybe they might not have meant it.  I think she should have shown it them and not her big brother!!!! haha

Some family members use a lot more tact that others. A friend told me the story of one of their family members.  When he doesn’t want to do something with the family he says—I would love tooooo but I’m busy sorting my socks in my sock drawer!

Soooo Evelyn, not everyone can be an Evelyn, showed me how to use Google lens to find out what they are asking for anything on eBay (i.e. sorta kinda find the value of something)..  It was slicker than a whistle.  She does a lot of buying and selling and says she makes some money and enjoys it.  Sooooo, on our data questioning we asked clients if they have some talent that would help in their recovery or help someone in their community.  A client told me she has a lot experience with the computer and could help people.  Soooooo, I told her my story about Google lens.  She said to me—erv, where have you been all your life! What a hoot!

Soooo Linda, another gal on our team, bought something from the thrift store as well.  She was telling Pete, her husband. and me about it.  She was all excited. Pete said—I have a rule, she can buy anything and put in in our house but she has to take something out; we don’t need more stuff in our house.  I think ol’ Pete’s bark is much harsher than his bite.  He loves Linda soooo much; I think he melts like butter!

Have a FUN day my friends unless you have other plans. (-:

erv

MyFriendJean said--One of the finest accomplishments is making a long story short.

energy source

WorldClassLarry says--If I want to improve my life, I need to be around energy sources (e.g. thermodynamic sources) that get me going.  And what might they be? CoachB says--If we are going to change we need to get to a different level. Suck it up cupcake and let's get going. We're burnin' daylight!

SusieQ says--I probably will need to change some things in my life like a new energy source (i.e. change is hard it seems).  Maybe replace my energy sources that don’t add value to my life with energy sources that do. Soooo when I went to my hometown church, it was fun to see my friends of the church. We enjoyed each other’s company again. I was catching up with a friend and I told him about a new source of energy that came into my life which is pretty exciting.  He said—erv, this new source of energy gives you hope (i.e. my friend has good insight, he does). He is exactly right; this new energy source is a great feeling. No question. LuckieEddie says—erv, you can’t get to where you’re supposed to be by staying were you are. I read in the paper soooo it must be right what Iowa Hawkeye Jack Campbell said about himself being drafted in the first round by the Detroit Lyons--I plan to be the best version of Jack Campbell I can be every single day. I try to live my life that way. Big on the try!

Richard Blackaby, an author and international speaker, tells the story about a businessman who expressed frustration that God had been silent when he sought wisdom about whether to accept an offer for a new job. This man claimed he had taken the job because he did not hear from God. It turned out to be a terrible decision. Blackaby said while talking with the individual, he began asking some probing questions: “What did your wife think about the job?” “Oh, she never liked the idea,” the businessman replied.  Next, Blackaby asked about whether the man had consulted with his pastor. “He’s not a business guy, so I ignored him!” he responded. “Even my son told me not to take the job, but he’s just a kid.” Immediately recognizing what the problem might be, Blackaby observed, “It sounds like God spoke several times. You just weren’t listening.” 

Coach B says—"Seek wise counsel and listen to them. You will rarely run into trouble, and you will rarely run into danger when you get and take advice from a multitude of wise people. And then take the advice that they give you.” I am potentially contemplating a major decision. I talked to our children and their spouses in depth about this and also to some friends. I’m listening to what they think as they have and will influence my decision. They are wise and see the situation from a different angle beside being very important to me. TomSmart says--By all means erv, listen up!

AverageJoe says--Climate change, sexuality, pandemic, election security, gun rights, and racial justice are all culture-war buzz words fraught with baggage. These words divide, and we often can’t even talk to each other about them. How can we solve our problems when we can’t talk to each other? Lincoln said—A house divided cannot stand. That statement applies to relationships and friendships and churches as well.  Are my relationships/friendships divided?  Am I compatible with folks that I am close toooo?  I hope sooo. I would guess it’s not much fun when folks aren’t.

ItchieBitchie says--When someone presents opposite points of view, they may say, ‘On the one hand...’ then say, ‘On the other hand... .’ That is like talking about the pros and cons! I recently visited with a friend who went to a celebration of faith service for a friend in a church that they used to attend.  She saw a lot of old acquaintances and friends from years past. She said it was quite fun.  A pastor of many years ago spoke.  She said he was very well liked when he served their church.  I asked her why. Well, he admitted that he didn’t know all the answers and actually talked about both sides of the issue. People could relate to that. They trusted him and they liked to be around him, I guess. WildWillie says—Usually folks get pretty sick of folks who always think they know all the answers (i.e. and really don’t). Huh, interesting.

Being around other likeminded  folks (i.e. on most things) on the mission trip impacted my life. These folks are from all over the U.S. and Canada. But if we talk to the same folks every day about the same stuff and all think the same, we become stuffy and boring, my opinion. Soooo is it good to be open minded and talk to a broad range of folks with different opinions who are not just like-minded folks? I was talking with one likeminded person who told me that she was very certain that she was right but after much study and thought she changed her mind. Huh, interesting. Hey listen folks, we are influenced by our past environment, our current environment and our genetics. Don’t kid yourself! Study and thought could make a person’s head turn. Saturday question—Have you ever changed your mind about anything? If you haven’t, I doubt you are very open-minded (i.e. my opinion). Actually you might be stuck in the mud! Ouchy ouchy!

I have relearned that everyone has different abilities in solving problems.  Way different!  Soooo some are very good and some are very poor and many in the middle in solving problems. It is a huge massive disadvantage if we are poor problem solvers. Sooo how can folks become better problem solvers?  There are many ways but some ability is in our genetics, our past environment and our current environment.  No question. Working with clients for disaster relief I saw terrible problem solving. That is why they come to see us; we can gather their information and probably get them a case manager who will help them make decisions. Literally, many can not do it by themselves or do a very poor job doing it.  I encourage all of us to be advocates for folks who don’t have good decision-making abilities (i.e. and maybe we might not have good problems skills either soooo then we need to point them to someone who does). GeorgeTheCrook says--But many don’t want help soooo there you go. CoachB says—Most everyone wants change, but no one wants to be changed. Ouchy ouchy! It appears that many just want to kick the same can down the same street and call it good. DoingItTheSameWally says--By making the same mistake over and over I at least learn to do one thing well!

I have had the opportunity to be a part of the World Renew team in helping hurricane victims find some help in trying to get their lives and property back to some normality the last two weeks (i.e. we are on our way back today). You might say—wow! that must be depressing. No no just the opposite.  It was joyous. I realize that some of you won’t understand this.  ItchieBitchie says--The world says—Help yourself by making more money, that is how you find joy! To me helping others was a breath of fresh air (e.g. a friend was helping take care of her great grandson who is two.  He was sleeping and woke up and came down the steps and said—"me waked up gg" with a big grin; my friend said it was such a joyous feeling that money can’t buy). Freshness doesn’t last very long. It disappears pretty fast. That is why we need to freshen our lives with really good stuff like helping others (i.e. such a joyous feeling). Dr.J says—"Even our personalities become spoiled and stale if we don’t continually renew them with fresh joy, fresh grace, and fresh experiences. We cannot live today on yesterday’s joy. We can’t borrow from tomorrow’s grace. God gives us day by day a fresh supply of all we need to remain inwardly renewed. He gives us seasons of refreshing and daily bread for our soul.”  But we ain’t going to get this feeling sitting on the couch eating chips let me tell ya!  I told you that I asked to pray with all my clients that I had the opportunity to work with and they all accepted. Well, some of them prayed for me and World Renew.  Why? They were soooo appreciative that someone cared about them. They are very stressed and many feel that no one cares about them. Saturday question—Have you ever been desperate and had nowhere to turn? Have you ever been in dire straights? How did you feel? And some of us have never had this experience soooo we have no idea! Soooo maybe we shouldn't be soooo judgmental.

A team member who is a widow told me--When my husband died 8 years ago I thought maybe I would find another man. Now that 8 years have passed, I don't have a man. Now I'm 8 years older and the odds are becoming less and less as there aren't as many men anymore.  And besides, I'm very independent, strong willed and aggressive which many men don't like! This gal is fun, a hoot! LuckieEddie says--Yabut if she is rich, I could put up with her!

Any time we volunteer we need to be flexible and patient and easy going. OneWiseGuy said to me--erv, there is too much talk and not enough action. And I'm not good at talking about nuttin all the time. He needs to relax and cool his jets. haha  That's just the way it works folks. I have found out that most volunteers are aggressive folks and want to get after it (i.e. accomplish something and be useful). But there are some that maybe just are along for the ride maybe just want to eat the donuts. But not in our group! These folks were on a mission! They were all focused! Good folks with good hearts; my kind of folks.

To sum up my experience--Proverbs 31:9 says--Yes, speak up for the poor and helpless, and see that they get justice. 

Have a FUN day my friends unless you have other plans. (-:

erv

MyFriendJean said--Judge others as you want to be judged.

spit it out

A friend tells me when I sorta kinda fumble with words—Spit it out erv! Remember folks, you won’t know if this It’s Saturday is for real until ya know it; ya never know until ya know about anything in life!  A member of our team said—erv, in Canada we have a statement that goes like this—Bull shit baffles the brain! Such is life.

Humor is a two-edge sword; it is fun, but it is misunderstood many times and sometimes it can hurt. For some folks they have no humor in their life; they just never laugh. I had a friend who is now deceased who never laughed.  He didn’t understand humor soooo I never used humor around him.  He just never got it. Why? I have no idea. I have another friend who seems to be always laughing (i.e. always soooo happy) and also makes me laugh. This friend is soooo much fun to be around. The gal who did our morning breakfast at our motel, Terry, was soooo happy.  I asked her if she is always this happy--pretty much, once in a while I get in a short funk!--She pointed to her name tag which under her name she had printed--Morning Sunshine.  I said--I like folks like you!  She was happy and proud to get that compliment (i.e. she should be).   

Kindness can not be misunderstood; it just spits out!  Soooo at the same motel breakfast I was wearing my Boston tee shirt and a couple of gals asked it I was from Boson.  They were from Maine and told me that I should come and visit Maine. I told a friend about their suggestion and we might just do that. These gals were soooooo kind and pleasant.  See how kindness and niceness affects folks. Huh, interesting.

Abraham Lincoln said—"Men are not flattered in being shown that there has been a difference of purpose between the Almighty and them.” Do you think that is funny?  Do you understand what he is saying? Was he serious, being humorous, or a little of both? Does it sting at all?  It is in the “wit of Lincoln” section of the book about him soooo…!

Personality can open doors, BUT only character can keep them open. ~ Elmer G. Leterman. Abraham Lincoln said—"You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all of the people some of the time, but you cannot fool all of the people all of the time.” I had a friend who is now deceased who told me once (i.e. he just spit it out) that he didn’t think he had any real friends; he said--I bought my friends, obligated folks to be my friends or forced them to be my friends. Ouchy ouchy! SweetJane says—If we just have one good friend, our whole life is soooo much better!

When coming back from CO I was in eastern CO on I-76 where there are only tumble weeds, cows and coyotes doing my standard 80 mph at about 7 in the morning when a high-end SUV with two high-end bikes on the back and a high-end wind dynamic cargo carrier on the top with Dallas County Iowa license plates passed me going 90+.  I thought, now that is how you make good time.  About 2 miles down the road I see this vehicle making a U-turn from the other direction through the median and takes off in front of me.  That can mean only one thing!  I go a few more miles and see the lights flashing down the interstate.  Yep, Mr. CO Highway Patrol was saying—Good morning Mr. Iowan, may I see your license and registration, and your proof of insurance, please! And the moral of this story is—You get to decide! Spit it out! Another team member told me that her dad would not tell us kids what to do. He would say--If you want to grow up to be an idiot, that is up to you!

When in Waukee, our 10-year old grandson Rookie asked his father and me if we were President what would be the #1 change you would try to make. I fumbled around and finally spit something out that wasn’t anything that really could be made into law (i.e. that we treat others better sooo we can trust each other). Soooo later that evening we had a family discussion about what everyone thought. Not everyone had the same idea.  Quite interesting! Great ideas! Of course, all those ideas would need to have a method of accomplishing them and then policing them. Reality is they ain’t goin’ happen! One reason is that there is toooo much money involved by money interest groups who have a lot of power. It's all about the money, don't kid yourself.

A friend sent me this.  There are two ways of exerting one's strength: One is pushing down, and the other is pulling up. ~ Booker T. Washington      Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor. For if either of them falls, the one will lift up their companion. ~ Ecclesiastes 4:9-10   A good friendship/relationship is soooooo valuable, my opinion. If you have one good friend you are rich! Money can’t buy that! When I got back from AZ, the pilot light on my hot water heater was off.  I tried to light it but no go.  I called a friend, who can do anything, if he would try before I call the plumber.  He had no problem and had it going in a minute; I didn’t press the ignition button while holding down the pilot button.  He probably saved me a wad of money.  I hope I can help him someday. MissPerfect says—Helping each other makes good friendships/relationships.

A lot of you are good problem solvers, you just are!  I try to make problem solving a game: it's just more fun to do that for me.  My brother-in-law Larry is a great problem solver. He says he’s also very impatient with people who think out loud but never say anything (e.g. he sang and sings in their church choir for years and when the choir director would over talk everything, he would put a copy of “Auto Trader” in his music and read the car adds as she rambled on!).  See, he’s quite a problem solver! He made it a game! Sooooo we were going down I-75 on our way to FL and Larry says to me—erv, I am who I am and that’s just the way it is.  I said to him—And Larry make no mistake about it, you are really good at it!  And my kid sister, Doris, his wife, said—And he never changes! What a hoot!

We have 19 on our team with World Renewal of the CRC Christian Reformed Church denomination that are doing assessments of needs of hurricane Ian victims of 2022. We have heard many difficult stories of frustration, financial loss, and personal problems. Most of our team are members of the CRC (i.e. real folks with good hearts; my kind of folks).  World Renewal is well received in the disaster program world. They do an excellent job. We were told that we could ask if we could pray for the clients but did not have too. All the folks that I asked if I could pray with them, accepted. We were not pressured to push our faith. Saturday question—Do you think that method works well? This was a soft, gentle opportunity and experience.

Spit it out erv!  This is an opinion, opinions are just that, opinions, soooo they ain’t worth anything other than being fillers!  Soooo when doing assessments of hurricane victims’ damage, I again discovered that it’s best to listen. Don’t talk about ourselves but listen to them (i.e. our clients are the main event).  Some folks have a hard time with that as they want to be the star attraction. We were told that listening is the key component of doing a good evaluation for them. Makes sense to me. Soooo, I think we have many times tooooo high of expectations driven by our egos and also predeterminations of the way we think it should sound and be (i.e. not good). As I told my old golf buddies when they complained about their golf game—Lower your expectations and then you won’t be disappointed! I think I operate better when I take the “low key approach.” Saturday question—Is that approach being part of being humble?

Spit it out erv!  I have noticed, observed, and realized that all folks need help (i.e. me especially).  Some of us need different kinds of help than others. Some folks don’t have the knowledge, connections, or finances needed or the ability to know how to communicate to get help.  WE NEED TO HELP EACH OTHER I have relearned. And helping each other is such a great feeling.  If we just help ourselves (i.e. all about me and my ego) and not others, we are really missing the boat (i.e. my opinion). And especially if we help others who cannot help us back (i.e. that is a true gift, my opinion). CoachB says—When you learn how to be comfortable in your head you will never be disappointed and always will be comfortable.  I’m comfortable doing what I’m doing these two weeks.  A United Way reprehensive who is a great guy, told us that his wish for our team was that we could reenergize the hope of the folks that have lost hope.

Jeff, anybody can be a Jeff, says--Those who hope in the Lord . . . will soar on wings like eagles. (Isaiah 40:31). Emily Dickinson in what might be her most beloved poem, “Hope is the thing with feathers, uses a bird as a metaphor for hope, and goes on to say that hope not only perches in the soul but also “never asked a crumb of me.” Hope doesn’t cost anything, and, most importantly, as both Dickinson and Isaiah note, it can fly.

Sooooo last Sunday, we had a couple of hours soooo we went to Venice Beach.  It was fun.  On the way back we stopped in old town Venice for a few minutes.  I was buying a couple post cards and was checking out.  There was a customer in front of me soooo the clerk said I should go to the other clerk as she is free soooo I did. I said to her—the other clerk said I should see you as you are free (i.e. she interpreted free different than how I meant that she did not have a customer, she laughed). She asked if I wanted paper or plastic. I said—I don’t really care as I’m easy. She said—Aren’t we a pair, I’m free and you are easy!  We both laughed!

Have a FUN day my friends unless you have other plans. (-:

erv

MyFriendJean said—More ears and less mouth!

making the turn

Yogi said—When you come to the fork in the road, take it!  SusieQ says--Aaaah man!  I never know what to do when I come to the fork, I just don’t know, I just never know, I honestly just don’t know what turn to take! Saturday question--Have you ever came to the fork and made the wrong turn? How about have you made the right turn?

We get to know a lot of folks in our lifetime.  Many we even call friends.  We maybe know about them intellectually (i.e. surface information) but that is about it (i.e. know their profile).  Others we know differently such as family and maybe special friends or spouses. If we really know someone, usually we get to know them intimately like we have feelings of rapport, affection, trust, and love with them. When we do, then we start making the turn! Saturday questions—How many folks do you know intimately? Have you ever had an intimate relationship fall apart?  Why did that happen?

Dr.J told this story—"A parent tells a teenager to be home by 10:30 at night, but the teen comes home at 11:30. The teen heard the instructions audibly, but he didn’t hear them in a way that affected his behavior. His ears received the instructions, but his heart didn’t.” Can any of you relate to that story as a teenager or one of your children as teenagers? At some point most teenagers make the turn; big on the most! I saw this plate on a golf cart in our 55+ AZ park.  It’s kind of fun to be that teenager again, I admit it! Making another turn! Many folks in 55+ parks have a golf cart, not to play golf, but to drive around and talk and go to a happy hour.  Of course, a number of them can’t walk very well anymore.  But they all seem like they can talk, eat, and drink! Such is life.

Karen, anybody can be a Karen says this—"A new spirit I will put within you. (Ezek. 36:26) If you were ever a candidate for cataract surgery, your doctor probably promised that your dull and drab world would be bright and colorful after your surgery. Of course, you couldn’t know that your world was dull and drab until you had the surgery. You had to take that step in order to find a new world.”  I like that statement. That’s being proactive a.k.a. positive. Sooooo the question is, what’s a new spirit and how do I get it? LuckieEddie says—Some folks change (i.e. a noticeable difference), and some folks stay the same.  Why is that? What causes that anyway?

Life makes us turn alright!  Here are a couple of communications from friends:  #1Hard week for me, as we said good-bye to a longtime friend. He had been going downhill for some time, and did not recognize me when I visited him after returning home from Arizona.  Yes, a great friend. ------" Friends are like four leaf clovers, ---- very rare. and hard to find" .   He was an easy guy to relate to when getting to know him, particularly after I learned he had 4 season tickets the Husker football games on the 35-yard line ---our friendship developed and fell into place real quickly.  Funny how that works.”  #2  “2 friends’ husbands have died, 2 Celebration of Life services in 1 week. It sort of makes the big world go away and the importance of family and friends come closer….” 

The turn isn’t always easy to make!  I was talking to a person who is president of a group.  She said to me—erv, it’s really hard to get folks to think from another’s perspective. And maybe it’s hard for all of us to think from another’s perspective.  Now that could be about any subject or belief from politics to religion to money management or anything else. I discovered that I don’t think I have voiced my opinion about controversial stuff much this winter.  I have heard my share but have not said anything or much.  I try to listen. I probably still have my opinions and beliefs but just haven’t shared them.  No one really cares anyway sooo why get all excited.  Basically, what I say is irrelevant. “Better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid than to open it and remove all doubt.”  Mark Twain

I had a talk with a friend about a team concept.  We both described what we thought a team concept is.  Sooooo what is yours?  We agreed with our definitions.  One concept that we discussed is that members of a team is wanting the best for the team (i.e. like to win) and not just about themselves.  Soooo if you are in a friendship or relationship with someone and are a team player, why wouldn’t you do everything to help the other person and in effect help the team. Why would you want to hurt each other? Good team players do, we decided, complement each other to make the team great! GeorgeTheCrook says—Some folks just aren’t team players. In many sport franchises and in business, and in marriages, they get rid of poor team players. Ouchy ouchy!

On my way home from AZ I stopped at Waukee and to see Charlie perform in her 7th grade musical.  There were maybe 40 7th graders in the musical and maybe 10 stage hands.  They all didn't have the leads; there can only be a couple of lead actors and actresses.  But to have a successful musical there has to be minor participants as well.  That is a team effort.  Charlie had 15 lines and sang in 4 groups.  She had a great experience. 

You ever feel like you are living in a survival mode?  I read that many folks are doing just that. Just trying to live one day more and have no idea about their future.  Live today and the heck with tomorrow (i.e. sounds like our government). Life can pretty hectic for many. LuckieEddie says—Probably many folks don’t know any different. Saturday question—Are you living your life in a survival mode? Sorry to say, I think I have learned this winter that many seniors are just coasting on out! Not enjoying life to the fullest for sure.  They need a change.  Some do want a change, but it is soooo hard to do.  Tooooo bad for many it appears to me. And some get “an unexpected bingo” in their life and their life is enhanced. Maybe we need to ripen up as we make the turn.

FREE OPINION at no cost!  I believe a very good prayer we can pray for anyone that is soooo simple but soooo powerful.  And it is to pray that a person may receive wisdom. Wisdom is soooo powerful and takes care of everything. “Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take. Don’t be impressed with your own wisdom. Instead, fear the Lord and turn away from evil.” Proverbs 3:5-7. I pray for wisdom a lot; you all know I need it!  The Bible says in James 1:5, “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you,”. Really folks, I don’t know what is best for me or you, I ain’t that smart.  ItchieBitchie says--Yabut erv, I am! ItchieBitchie, maybe, just maybe, if you ask God for wisdom you just might be turning the corner! Wisdom is very all-encompassing! Like a catchall!

I like new experiences! That includes new ideas, new foods, new conversations, new activities, new folks to talk to, new excitement, new refreshing things, new scenery, new food to eat, new opinions, etc.  I realize that most folks like everything the same forever (i.e. don’t change a thing please).  I don’t. I am probably in the minority here.  That comes from a person who has lived in Aplington for 54 years and lived in the same house for 48 years and was married to Arlene for 51 years.  Soooo you can believe either side of me! Crazy huh! AverageJoe asks—erv, which side of your mouth are you talking out of?

I was home in Aplington, IA (i.e. Butler County) for just a few days but now I'm on my way again.  I have been invited by my kid sister and brother-in-law to go with them on a two-week mission trip with World Renew to FL helping the hurricane victims. I am really looking forward to this.  A new event in my life.  It sure beats sitting on the couch and eating chips and self-serving myself. That’s my opinion. Don’t kid yourself, I will self-serve myself later!  I have plans. haha

I was ending my walk when in Morrison, CO one morning last week when I noticed three senior ladies meeting at one of their places and packing a SUV including their bicycles for an outing.  They were all in good physical shape (i.e. were doing more that sitting on the couch eating chips).  I hear folks say all the time, I should do something and get out of my lazy attitude; I have a lot of ideas and plans. Sooooo I ask them, what have you done in the last year--and their answer usually is--NUTTIN! 

Victor Frankel, the famous German psychologist who endured for years in a concentration camp, wrote the book Man’s Search for Meaning (i.e. a book I have read multiple times--I think it's that good--an icon) says this, “ One who is to give light must endure the burn.”

Last call for passenger, BettyOffTheBoat, the door will will close soon! 

Have a FUN day my friends unless you have other plans. (-:

erv

MyFriendJean said--It is better to bite your tongue than to let it bite someone else.