Saturday question--Are you a grumbler, bellyacher, crabber, quarreler, squawker, quibbler or a person who endures, tolerates, cheers, applauds, and commends?
A couple weeks ago I taught 5th grade. That is something that I never did before (i.e. a new experience). ANYWAY I felt like I harped a lot. I kept saying--Be quiet be quiet be quiet! And I don't think my harping had an impact on them as they just kept being noisy! Maybe I was tooooo nice. I guess if I was a full time teacher I would get that corrected. I heard an experienced teacher taking them to physical ed say--Be quiet and get in line real loud. They responded.
At some point the kids start hovering over their parents. I went for a long bike ride on the Cedar Valley trails the other day. It was 43 degrees but really wasn't bad at all. I saw only 3 other bikers who were also crazy seniors. I wanted to make a call on my cell but there was a message on the screen about a web site. Did I want it or not. I didn't want it but couldn't get the darn thing off my screen. Sooo I decided when I saw the next young person, I would ask them for help. The next guy was about 30 and he was playing on his iPhone sooooo I asked him if he could help me. He looked at my phone and said--I haven't seen one of these phones for years! I can't help you! I think he thought my flip phone went well with my AZ cap, my nylon running pants with rubber bands around the ankles to keep them out of the chain, and my brown jersey cotton gloves. I bet he shuck his head and laughed after I left. He didn't know but I had a good laugh toooo! Such is life.
GeorgeTheCrook says--You ever feel like you are always harping about something. Nutten is ever right. You are always gripping. Always gripping. Always nagging! You never are an encourager but always negative. I like to get compliments. Do you? If folks are shown appreciation, I think they will actually try harder to please you. You will have a better relationship. Joesixpack says--Yabut some folks need correction as they don't make very good judgements. That is true Joesixpack but they don't seem to know that sooooooo somehow a suggestion needs to be made with a positive spin. Is that possible do you think?
They say it takes many positive sayings to offset a negative statement to a child or an adult (i.e. 5 positive to each negative statement). Many folks seem to put a slam on everything they say to everyone especially family instead of a positive twist. Some folks can say something with a positive twist to something negative and it works much better and it much more accepted. And some can't.
Some parents are always harping--Don't don't don't. Do you think that gets old and non productive? I think sooooo! My parents, Chester and Anna, gave us kids a lot of responsibility and let us make many decisions at a young age. We also got to suffer the consequences at an early age. I don't know if that was planned or just happened. Maybe it was part of the big plan as my parents died when us kids were pretty young. Maybe it was to be that way. I don't know. I don't remember our folks harping a lot at us. I sometimes wish they would have more. I wish they would have pushed me more like to study more or have higher expectations. They just seemed to let us ramble along. I had great parents who taught me a lot, a whole lot but we sorta kinda learned it from their example and not from any harping I think. But they made us do certain things even if we didn't want to. And they were firm disciplinarians. Is that good or bad?
I read it in the paper sooooo it must be right that if enough folks tell a person that they don't look well, the person will actually think they are not well. I wonder if enough folks say positive stuff to a person if that person will respond accordingly. You think sooooo? Here is an experiment to try. Make an attempt to say 5 positive things to a certain person each day for a week. See if they change how they respond to you. For some folks, this would make the other person wonder what is going on especially if you never say anything positive to the other person but just are a haprer (i.e. might think you are cuckoo). Try it.
I have a friend who's wife tells him--before you says something to others, big dog, say it to yourself three times. Now that might work. Maybe we won't say such things that we wish we would not have said. Good idea smart lady. Maybe lighten up the situation instead of harping might work toooo. Make fun of it and not be soooo serious (i.e. don't get soooo offended). Maybe if we can take a jab and not react with another jab life might be better tooo (i.e. don't go for the juggler all the time). Or best yet, just keep our mouth shut. Don't say anything. Now I bet that would work sometimes instead of saying something stinging back. Ever wonder if maybe you are wrong sometimes and the other person is right? I'm going to try these things. Yes I am.
When the kids were young and we were traveling in our mini van, sometimes Arlene and I would sorta kinda get after each other about directions. They hated our disputes and would go as far back in the van as they could. I don't think kids like their parents always being at each other. I don't enjoy being around couples who are always jabbing, arguing, disagreeing, up shooting each other. You get two strong personalities going after each other, well, it ain't pretty folks. It gets real old to me (i.e. sorta kinda like the presidential debates). Such is life.
I hope you don't think I'm harping here folks. It's to be an encouragement. Rocky says--Mortification means killing the very roots of self-love; pride and possessiveness, anger and violence, ambition and greed in all their disguises, however respectable those disguises may be, whatever uniforms they wear. In fact, it really means the entire transformation of our personal, professional and political life into something more consistent with our real situation as small dependent, fugitive creatures; all sharing the same limitations and inheriting the same half-animal past. That may not be very impressive or unusual; but it is the foundation of all genuine spiritual life...wherever we find people whose spiritual is robust and creative, we find that in one way or another this transformation has been effected and this price has been paid.
Just remember what ItchieBitchie says--Voting is like a jar of Jalapeno peppers--what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Have a FUN day my friends unless you have other plans. (-:
erv
MyFriendJean says--One person can start a quarrel, but it takes two to keep it going.
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