It's Saturday: pretend

Some of you folks might think I’m just shouting from the cheap seats! I understand that. And, you know what, I might be! Just remember, you get what you pay for! SusieQ says—erv, your ideas are like rabbits. You get a couple and learn how to handle them, and pretty soon you have a dozen. And erv, most of your ideas all smell like guano!

I know lots of people, who it appears, like to pretend (i.e. DuaneTheWorm is the grand champion a.k.a. the purple ribbon winner). Little kids like to play dress up and wear Superman/Superwoman stuff and adults pretend in soooooo many ways (i.e. many times they do it for approval of others). Some folks pretend soooo long that they don’t know who they really are anymore (i.e. have worn a mask for a long time). BUT reality is, most know the truth and most get tired of the deception BUT for the most part, most folks keep doing it. I read in the paper soooo it must be right that social media is a great avenue for folks to be fakers. MissPerfect says—I never post a picture of myself five minutes after I get up—now that is the real me. Yikes!

In “Richards III,” William Shakespeare wrote, “An honest tale speeds best being plainly told.” A friend and me had a discussion over breakfast a while ago. We both think that being real is soooo important; not many if any folks like folks who aren’t. He told me that years ago a salesman came to his place in hopes of selling him something. He said—This guy was soooo full of wind; I saw right through him almost right away; half of what he said was lies and the other half wasn’t true. This friend was going to preach/talk at his church the next Sunday. We had a long discussion about how important for all folks to be sincere and straight forward. You believe that? JoeBlow says—I don’t know about that; I think there are a lot of folks who would rather hear the “glossed over version” or the version that “fits them the best.” Ouchy ouchy!

If this paragraph sounds sorta kinda preachy; it is! It is by Pastor Rick Warren. In Christian fellowship, people should experience authenticity. Authentic fellowship is not superficial, surface-level chit-chat. It’s genuine, heart-to-heart, sometimes gut-level sharing. It happens when people get honest about who they are and what is happening in their lives. They share their hurts, reveal their feelings, confess their failures, disclose their doubts, admit their fears, acknowledge their weaknesses, and ask for help and prayer. Authenticity is the exact opposite of what you find in many churches. Instead of an atmosphere of honesty and humility, there is pretending, role-playing, politicking and superficial politeness, and shallow conversation. People wear masks, keep their guards up, and act as if everything is rosy in their lives. These attitudes are the death of real friendship. Of course, being authentic requires both courage and humility. It means facing our fear of exposure, rejection, and being hurt again.

JoeStumbleThroughIt (i.e. a real sledgehammer) says—I can see right through folks; they can’t fool me. You might be surprised JoeStumbleThroughIt; you might be surprised. JoePsychologist says--As long as we respond predictably to what feels good and what feels bad, it is easy for others to exploit our preferences for their own ends. Ouchy ouchy! Surely I wouldn’t do that! Ya right erv, you might be the champion; you might be just pretending again!

I might have made a discovery that I didn’t understand before. I don’t know for sure but I sorta kinda think soooo. I am thinking that our culture is changing/has changed soooo drastically, that it cannot and will not ever return (i.e. a point of no return—it’s an impossibility). This thought was solidified by a friend on the golf course. He didn’t realize he impacted me by what he said. He said something to the effect that the seniors of today want to life an active life style and many have the affluence to do it. They don’t want the old way and don’t want to return to it regardless even if others want them toooo. CadillacJack says--If it looks like a duck, swims like a duck, and quacks like a duck, then it probably is a duck.

I was thinking how Sunday afternoons have changed. Several of our older clients of years past would have their living rooms lined with many many chairs. The reason was that they had large families and Sunday afternoon all the kids, their spouses, and grandkids came to visit. It was the culture. They had to have chairs for everyone to sit. I shared this with a senior friend recently. She said—I remember going to my late husband’s parents every Sunday afternoon and all the chairs were filled with their adult kids and spouses. We would serve afternoon tea to all of them. And they all would take cream and sugar; his dad would drink his tea out of the saucer. We laughed.

I heard this analogy about pretending. If you see someone swimming in the ocean, how do you know if they have a swimming suit on? Well, you don’t until the tide rolls out; then you know! Coach said—You don’t know if all other folks’ stuff is real or make belief until the tide rolls out; then they are exposed (i.e. it is what it is). Abraham Lincoln said—You can foul some of the people all of the time, and all the people some of the time but you can’t fool all the people all of the time.

Sometimes I pretend that I/we are ok but I/we really aren’t (i.e. I can stuff my feelings away but they just pop out somewhere else).Soooooo I took a respite to CO last week. This is how I feel about respites. It’s much like our flocks that are now in the shade of trees that have grown up in our back yard compared to flocks that are in the direct sunlight. I needed a break and besides, I soooo much wanted to see our kids and grandkids.

I think I have recognized a need here for me and everything just worked out. Onesmartperson says—Do what needs to be done when it needs to be done. I think that makes life soooo much better. What do you think? That is what I thought.

Erin got an award at school and part of why she got it is because of her character. I sent her this and told her what it meant when I was there. Character is not pretending; it’s what we really are. A golf buddy told me this story the last time we played. They have a group from their church that plays on Saturday mornings. A guy from their church always talks about his good scores but doesn’t play with their group. The reason why is that he takes mulligans a.k.a. do-overs all the time when he hits a bad shot (i.e. cheats). Everyone knows it; he’s a joke a.k.a. a pretender! Is that funny or what. BennyBen says--It’s human nature to minimize our limitations and take credit for our accomplishments. BennyBen, it appears that some folks have more human nature in them than others. ha ha

I’m not pretending; I had no idea what those words meant; in fact, I couldn’t even pronounce them. I had to goggle them. I learned something again. I like what the saying is trying to say to me. Faith, family, and friends are gold. I’m not pretending when I have to ask for help (i.e. maybe I would rather pretend to know it all). ANYWAY, late last winter the electric starter failed on our snowblower. I goggled it and it said the spring-loaded part of the starter probably got hung up and wouldn’t engage because of lack of oil or a little rust. It showed how to fix it. Sooooo the other day I took it off and took the starter motor apart. Easy as pie; I got it fixed; easy as pie. BUT I couldn’t get the starter motor together again! I had to go to my friend, Secretariat, for help (i.e. he knows everything and can do everything). I was trying to put the brushes on top of the armature, and he showed me that I had to put them on the outside or the armature (i.e. that makes sense). Bingo! Soooo it’s easy as pie if you know what you are doing. Such is life.

CadillacJack says—It appears that some folks like to be seen and heard rather than do what is important. C’mon, we all know those folks; they are dime a dozen. Why is that do you think? Here is an idea to try—be a true steward and a servant; the next time you do something for others, don’t tell anyone. John Calvin said--The highest honor in the Church is not government but service.

When I look back at my life (i.e. flashing by), I realize that many good things just seemed like they just fell into my lap. Ok, some seemingly bad stuff fell in my lap toooo. This respite to CO was such a good thing that seemingly fell into my lap. I didn’t really plan it, but it just happened. It appears that tooooo many times we think toooo much of the bad stuff and not the good stuff. I do! Benjamin Disraeli, the British prime minister from1874 to 1880, said, “What we anticipate seldom occurs; what we least expected generally happens.”

Before I die, I want to ________________________________! (i.e. fill in the blank). Sooooo I would be very curious to know what you filled in your blank with. Will you share it with me? It’s being real.

I quite often give the grand kids a gift usually in an oatmeal box. This time I gave them Gerbera Daisies. When Rookie took his he said—Is that all; is there another present? I asked Jimmer what he thought of his daisy—he said—not very good! I asked Charlie if she pouts—not a lot; but Rookie pouts a lot—Rookie said—now that is true. I asked Erin if she is a morning person—yes, I am most of the time; but Jimmer isn’t—Jimmer said—that is right! Charlie told me—Grandpa, you are funny even when you aren’t trying! Jimmer said he had a big fight with all his Army guys (i.e. 200+)—who won—no one lived! But Jimmer did really like the pen I gave him (i.e. a freebie from Marge’s CountryParlor). Such is life.