The other night Arlene and I walked around The Fountain of the Sun (i.e. 3.2 miles). We saw a couple walking who were holding hands. They must have been about 80. He had a pair of black leather pants on that were really tight (i.e. he was weebit struttin' his stuff all right). I bet it was his second or third wife. He knows how to WOW the ladies is my bet! That happens folks. We were at a outing at a church while back and they asked the couples who were married the longest to stand up. Then they asked the couples that were married the shortest to stand up. The couple beside me stood up. I asked them how long they were married--about 3 months. They were 79. During the whole program she held his hand in his crouch! It was a WOW factor to me! Oh ya! Such is life when you're about 80.
When our kids were here last weekend, James and Heather went to the hot tub. They said they could see an an old lady sitting in her chair through a window of a condo by the pool area. Heather said she was either dead or sleeping. I told her if she is dead, you'll hear sirens soon. No sirens--that's a WOW factor. The next night they went again and saw her awake in her chair. Such is life.
I was outside our condo the other day when R and M drove by--they stopped and talked. They were driving their two-seat Mercedes convertible (i.e. real cute--I liked it). They are rich retired farmers from ND. They just rent their zillion acres out for big cash. And to top it off, oil was struck on their ground. Now that's the way to do it (i.e. some folks seem to get all the breaks). M said, we use to think it was the old folks who went down to the Valley for the winter--here we are! Now that's a WOW factor folks. Yes it is. And you know what--I love it!
One of the guys I played pickle ball with last week (i.e. one of Dean's buddies) was Roger. He came late--I said you got to get out of bed earlier--that's not the problem, I'm up at 5:30 every morning--how come--I did it for 35 years as I owned a manufacturing company and I had too--well, at least you can get a lot done when you get up at 5:30--that's really not true, in my retirement I seem to get up early but don't every get much done! Now that's a WOW factor!
I have a friend down here in the Valley (i.e. an A'town gal) who is a Suns fan (i.e. well some of the time--when they win). I sent her an email when Nash fouled at the end of regulation to put the game into overtime last week (i.e. she's not a big Nash fan)--Jane, your man Nash put the game into overtime! That's my opinion. And she emailed back--What do you mean, my man? Even an old woman (me) would know when to foul and when not to foul!!!!! Now that's a WOW factor! She's a hoot folks!
An ol' prospector from the Superstition Mountains shuffled into Apache Junction leading a tired old pack mule. He were looking for the Lost Dutchman's Mine. The ol' man headed straight for the only saloon to clear his parched throat. He walked up and tied his ol' mule to the hitching rail. As he stood there brushing some of the dust from his face and clothes, a young gunslinger stepped out of the saloon with a gun in one hand and a bottle of whiskey in the other. The young gunslinger looked at the ol' man and laughed, saying, "Hey ol' man, have you ever danced?" The ol' man looked up at the gunslinger and said, "No, I never did dance . . . never really wanted to." A crowd had gathered as the gunslinger grinned and said, "Well you ol' fool, you're gonna dance now," and started shooting at the ol' man's feet. The ol' prospector, not wanting to get a toe blown off, started hopping around like a flea on a hot skillet. Everybody was laughing, fit to be tied. When the last bullet had been fired, the young gunslinger, still laughing, holstered his gun and turned around to go back into the saloon. The ol' man turned to his pack mule, pulled out a double-barreled shotgun, and cocked both hammers. The loud clicks carried clearly through the desert air. The crowd stopped laughing immediately. The young gunslinger heard the sounds too and he turned around very slowly. The silence was almost deafening. The crowd watched as the young gunman stared at the ol' timer and the large gaping holes of those twin barrels. The barrels of the shotgun never wavered in the ol' man's hands, as he quietly said, "Son, have you ever licked a mule's ass?" The gunslinger swallowed hard and said, "No sir . . . but . . . I've always wanted to." Now that's a WOW factor!
We went hiking recently with our BlueBunnyFriends on Butcher Jones trail by Saguaro Lake. We stopped at at the 'kissingvista" (i.e. Arlene and I always kiss at this vista). ANYWAY on the way back we stopped again and kissed. I told them to go on ahead as I was going to spend a little more time at the vista. For some ol' folks, they took off like some young mountain goats. I had a hard time catching 'em. I did fumbled around a little longer than expected at the vista though--I had my boxer shorts on backwards. When you get old you do things like that! It was a WOW factor!
I read it in the paper soooooo it must be right. The longer you leave grapefruit on the tree the sweeter they become (i.e. you can take fruit off the tree in December through April--in fact it said, the trees can blossom with fruit on it). Soooooooo there you go, somethings get better with age (i.e. much like wine). And other don't--Arlene had her chorus concerts recently. Anyone can sing and anyone can volunteer for a solo. Some were good and some were...(i.e. huge massive egos--my opinion). Ouchy ouchy! But they all had a good time. I don't think voices get better with age. WOW factor even if some folks don't realize it. Such is life. Oh ya, we had my cousin and his wife along with our neighbors for pie and ice cream after the concert. We did something (i.e. my idea which some of you youngins might think it's ol' fashion). We sang our favorite hymns (i.e. only the first verse). Yep, that's what ol' folks do. It appears that these songs were the ones they wanted sang at their funerals! Holy Gulalupe you say. Guess what Dotta what mine was? I didn't know my cousin Lowell's favorite--By The Sea of Crystal. That song must really be an ol' one (i.e. he doesn't look that old--okay the song was written in 1933 soooooooo is that old or what). Have you heard of it? ANYWAY now that activity was different; I bet you youngins would never do that! We did play the card game up and down the river (i.e. now that's an ol' game)--Sandra kicked our butts!
Arlene and I hiked Usery Mt. Pass (i.e. app. 8 miles around Usery Mt). ANYWAY as were on our way, we came upon a couple ol' couples sitting eatin' their lunch. They were from Keokuk, IA. They said to us as we approached them--Here comes up a couple of ol' horses! We talked some--they seemed to pretty nice and normal. I still wondered about their comment. Just then a couple of ol' horses with riders on them came up the trail. That made me feel better! Talking about ol' horses. I started volunteering at the Bannor Desert Hospital. They assigned me to floors 3C and 4C (i.e. all the heart patients). What an experience--incredible--unbelievable. Soooooooo I reported and they just gave me the combinations to get in the equipment room and the supply closets and said--go at it. My first deal was helping an ol' stallion to leave the hospital--he couldn't walk, way obese, on oxygen, couldn't hear very well and he had no one to help him. We got him a cab and somehow got him in there. WOW! Then I went from room to room asking patients if I could help them in any way. WOW! I did little things but mostly they just wanted to talk--and they talked--everyone has a story and they know that they would not see me again soooooooo I heard unbelievable stories from multi-millionaires, an Apache Indian from the reservation, an alcoholic, a sharp businessman a Chinese guy who could hardly speak English to a gal with a PHD. Incredible stories. I had three of those patients ask me to pray for them--I didn't talk about anything spiritual, had a company issued volunteer shirt on, and was just erv. WOW! Then I helped another ol' stallion to the exit. I just take my time (i.e. time means nutten to me--I'm just a servant to them). What I heard from maybe 80% of the patients I talked to was--thanks for volunteering, you have no idea how we like you guys. WOW! Oh ya, one of the secretaries on the floor told me that the ol' horses (i.e. 70s and 80s just don't complain much after heart surgery; they want to get up even if it hurts and want to get going). She said the the younger folks (i.e. 50s and 60s complain a lot). MissPerfect says--You get no cheese with your wine so quit your whining--suck it up cupcake. Huh, interesting. When I walked to the car after my 4 hours, I had a feeling that I couldn't explain. It was something else folks. I will tell you what--I was emotionally tired. Really tired. There was a WOW factor there folks. Such is life.
This ain't nutten new folks, actually it's something real old but new to me. Lent is here (i.e. a contemplative period of self-denial and sacrifice). The traditional pillars of Lent are prayer, fasting and works of charity. Some folks have quit giving up something for Lent but try to do positive things, like helping people in need or without saying something mean...Lent is a wonderful time to grow close to the Lord (i.e. a time to get out of ruts, take a break from busy schedules and take stock and focus on the needs we have for Easter so that when Easter comes, we can really celebrate). The 40--day period or reflection, repentance and preparation culminates April 24 in what Christians regard as the high point of their calendar, the resurrection of Jesus Christ as a marked by Easter Sunday. Soooooooooooo I'm going to try to give up something I like until Easter. I think it will maybe make my attitude more positive and change my mind-set (i.e. hopefully more like Christ). It could be a WOW factor folks. I encourage you to do something this Lent (i.e. challenge yourself). Hey, it might even get you out of your punk attitude (i.e. if you are in one). Such is life.
We went to a spring training game of the Cubs this week. I read this in the paper soooooo it must be right--Thanks to Rev. Endicott Peabody, mere months after the so-called Gunfight at the O.K. Corral in October 1881, Tomstone formed a baseball team and began playing other mining camps in the area. The game caught on, and many baseball rivalries were born, some of them existing to this very day. In 1920, the Detroit Tigers were the first major league em to come to Arizona for spring training. Sorry to say Cub fans, it looks like the same ol' story to me--Wait 'til next year!!!! Boston Red Sox great Ted Williams once said that baseball "is the only field of endeavor where a man can succeed three times out of 10 and be considered a good performer." Such is life. Joesixpack says--Don't bet on the Cubs this year!!!!--that's maybe embellished without the season even starting folks but...same your money!
Ol'boyJohn was not playing very well so he asked his ol'buddyDenny what he should do (i.e. he was very discouraged). Ol'buddyDenny says to ol'gollferJohn, I think you should take a couple of weeks off and then quite! Ol'BoyCadillac Jack walks into Shadow Ridge pro shop to pay his $165 green fee with his Vista card in hand. As he walked up to the counter, the pretty little gal behind the counter stared at the spot in front of his Addias golf shorts. Ol"BoyCadillacJack saw that she was looking at it. The first thing Ol'BoyCadillacJack said to the sweet pretty little gal behind the counter--The spot is just water! Yes it's sorta kinda hard for us ol' small town IA boys to think about paying $165 for a round of golf (i.e. we paid $112 at 12:08--afternoon rate) when you can play at Aplington's golf course all year for $320. Such is life.
Ol'Don was going to play Superstition Mountain Country Club with his friends. On the way out the door he answered his wife Henny's "what time will you be home?" question with "probably about 1:30, I'll have lunch at the club." 1:30 came and went, 3:00 passed, 6:15, still not home, finally at about 7:00 pm he rolls in the driveway, leaves his clubs in the garage, and presents his wife with a pizza, and begins the apologetic story.We finished our game about 11:30, had lunch, and I started home, when alongside the road I saw this attractive girl with a flat tire on her car. I stopped to help, got the tire changed, and looked around for a place to wash my hands. She offered money, but I refused, so she suggested that I at least allow her to buy me a beer. She said there's a tavern just up the road, and they have a restroom, you can clean up a bit. I agreed to stop, we had a beer, then another beer, then a couple more, and I realized that this girl was not only pretty, she was very friendly, and a good companion to spend time with. Before I knew it, time just slipped away. And that is why I am so late getting home. His wife looked him right in the eye and said "don't give me that crap; you played 36 holes, didn't you?"
This might be old but it was new to me. Our little granddaughter (i.e. 3 year old Erin) has a new saying that she learned from Kara (i.e. her day care lady)--It's what you get and you don't throw a fit. Such is life.
Have a FUN day my friends unless you have other plans. (-:
erv
MyFriendJean says--If you are patient in one moment of anger, you will escape a hundred days of sorrow.
AtipfromKipwhospecializesingolfrelatedmentaldisorders--when chipping open club face, relax in swg (little bat)
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